With all I have
by SrKkAjOe
Summary: Bella Swan tells the story of her life. The story of doctor Bella who makes her dreams come true by healing people in Iran. As doctor Edward Cullen comes to help her they both discover that they still may have a shot at love...
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys, this is the first story I'm publishing and to be honest I'm really nervous. I hope you guys will like it!

This is the first chapter and believe me when I say that things are really going to change a lot, nice things are going to happen but also some sad things will happen. The first chapter is pretty short but it'll only be once, from the second chapter we will only have long chapters. Hope you guys enjoy it!

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><p>Chapter 1<p>

'Let him be here soon', I thought as I left the small hospital. It was already midnight, but it was always like that. Me working till midnight trying to save a patient. I loved my job to death and I still think I made the right choice by coming here, because these people needed me. Ten months ago I was in Seattle working in the hospital when suddenly my chief called for me:

"_Dr. Swan I got an answer on your letter," my chief said as he held a letter in his hands. 'This was it', I thought. "Do you want to read it yourself or do you want me to tell you?" he said with a smile on his face, I let out a deep breath and then asked him to just tell me. My hands were shaking too hard to hold the letter. "They accepted your offer Bella. You're going to Iran," I didn't know what to say. After all my dream was coming true. Yeah, you would think a stupid dream probably, but all I wanted to do in my life was become a doctor and help people like in Iran or in Iraq to heal because here we have enough doctors but there everyday tons of people day. "Hey if I knew you were going to cry I would have never told you," my chief teased, "These are happy tears chief. Happy tears."_

A week after he told me I moved here and since then I have healed tons of people but I have also lost a lot of people. In the beginning it was so hard for me, but I started getting my emotions under control. It still was hard for me but I could move on faster. But the couple of weeks there were so many attacks that I couldn't keep up anymore. I needed help, and I needed it fast because people were dying because the lack of help.

So I called Seattle and asked if they could do something for me. Two days I got a call from my chief telling me that there was a volunteer who wanted to come very badly; his name was Edward Cullen. He worked at the hospital in Port Angeles and would be here in a couple days. I thanked god every day for sending another doctor here. We would be able to save more people.

"Bella, we are going to have dinner at my house, you want to come?" Angela asked. She was a volunteer who was here for almost three years and was married to Ben Cheney, who was also a volunteer like her. They lived their lives like there was no tomorrow, I always envied them because I couldn't do that. "Dinner at this time? No Ang, I think I'll pass, I'm really tired. I will probably be out the moment my head touches a pillow," I said with a smile.

Angela was my best friend here. She's the only person with whom I could talk for hours and not get bored at all. We hit of the moment we were introduced to each other. "Okay then, but I do expect you for breakfast! You're losing too much weight women!" I nodded with a laugh, Angela made me think of my mother in a way.

Ah my mother, she was a free soul. She would never do this because it would be too much to handle for her. Renee only saw the happy sides of people. She would be crushed if she came in contact with the reality, she was a free bird who laughs and travelled all the time dragging my father Charlie with her. The only reason my father followed her was that he loved her to death. He would go anywhere she went. They are like magnets, she moved, he moved. That night I went to sleep thinking of my time with my parents, what a beautiful time it was.

The next morning I woke up with this crazy feeling that I didn't recognize but it made my smile for some reason. I pushed it a side and took a nice shower. I towel dried my hair and for the first time in months I didn't put my hair in a ponytail, I just left it loose. I got dressed in two minutes, because Angela was waiting for me. I took my white doctors coat and then ran to Angela's place.

She was already at the door waiting for me. "Wow, look at you, I didn't even know you had such beautiful hair," Angela teased "Good morning, Angela. Breakfast ready?" I said as I passed her and went inside. "Yep, just waiting for Ben to get dressed," she said very enthusiastically and with a big smile plastered on her face.

"Ang, why are you so cheerful this morning?" I asked as I hid my own smile. "Promise you won't tell Ben?" she said as she leaned closer. I nodded furiously because she really got me curious "Bella, I think I'm pregnant. First I thought that being late for a couple days was not such a big deal but today I'm ten days late, and that's longer than usually," she whispered "Oh my god Angela, that's amazing!" I whisper-yelled, "come to my place today so I can do a check- up. She nodded as Ben came in "Good morning ladies!" he said with a grin as he sat next to Angela.

Ben was always happy, like constantly teasing and telling jokes. He reminded me of my mother in a way. Even on the bad days he would pull out a joke to get us to smile. "So what were you two talking about?" he asked as he poured us a cup of tea, "Nothing honey, we were just talking about this and that," Angela said as I nodded. "Yeah sure, you two were probably gossiping like those old women do," Ben teased as Angela and I laughed.

After breakfast we all went to the small building were all our patients are, we simply called it our small hospital. I did my morning check-up and most of my patients were getting better, to my surprise. It had been three days since someone had died and that really made me the happiest person in the world. I just hoped we could keep it up.

We didn't have that much material, but with the things we did have we tried our hardest to save these people. "Good morning doctor Bella," I turned to the coming sound and saw Roma greeting me with a big smile on her face and a plate in her hand, "Good morning Roma, and what did I say about the doctor part? Please just Bella." I said with a smile as I walked outside with her, "I'm trying, but I always forget. Sorry Bella," she said with a frown which made me laugh "It's okay Roma".

Roma was the town teacher, that's why she speaks English so well. A couple months ago in one of the many attacks Roma's husband Tariq got hurt. I had tried my hardest to save him that day and I succeeded. Roma was so thankful that she came to visit me every day just to say thank you, that's how we became friends.

Most of the time she also brings me some food because she knew that some time I would skip a meal because of my work. I didn't mind, she did. "So what do you have for me today?" I asked with a smile, "I made you a delicious apple pie, your favorite," She was an awesome cook, but her apple pie was my favorite, no one's apple pie could compare to it "You're a saint!" I said so thankful that she actually made the time to do those things for me. "Next to you I'm nothing doctor..uh Bella" she corrected herself quickly before I could say something. "Let's not get there Roma," I said because we once had this discussion and it took us one and a half hour to agree to disagree. Not going there again.

"How is Tariq?" I asked changing the subject, "He's fine, great actually. His happier since he started working on the field again. I don't think he liked being home," "that's probably because he wants to take care of you sweetie and not the other way around," she thought about it for a second and then nodded, "I think you're right, with him being the man and all. I just worry you know, these last weeks we had so many attacks that it just scares me to death to think that one night he won't be coming home to me," she said with a frown. "Hey, now don't go there. We have to think positive, okay?" she nodded with a sigh.

"I need to get going. I have a class in ten minutes," Roma said and handed me the plate, "Thank you Roma, you really are the best!" she giggled as she started to walk away, "bye Bella," she said as she waved, I waved back at her and watched her walk away. Just when I wanted to walk in to the hospital I had that crazy feeling again. I got all tingly and felt butterflies in my stomach. 'So strange,' I thought by myself.

Suddenly a voice called out to me which made me shiver, "Excuse me, are you doctor Swan?" I turned to see to whom this beautiful voice belonged. In front of me stood a beautiful man with a crooked smile on his face and with a hint of amusement in his eyes. His hair was a strange color, something between blond and brown, like bronze. 'What a man', I thought as I took him in. Oh shit, he asked me something! What did he ask again? 'Think Bella, think!' I thought when I remembered that he actually had asked me if I was Bella or not.

"Uh yes, I'm doctor Swan, and you?" I asked silently cursing myself for stammering like an idiot. "I'm Edward Cullen, the volunteer," he said as he held out a hand to me. 'Oh kill me now', I thought as he told me he was Edward because that meant I was supposed to not only work with this gorgeous man but also live with him. 'It's your fault anyway! You offered the hospital to let the doctor stay in your cottage!' I cursed myself for coming up with that idea. "It's great to have you here doctor Cullen, we could definitely use another doctor," I said and really meant it because having him here meant that we could save more people.

"Edward please, and I'm sure you were doing great, doctor Swan," he said with a convincing smile. "Thank you Edward, and please do call me Bella" I said as I smiled at him. "Great, now can I get my hand back Bella?" he said with an amused expression as my face went tomato red, "Oh I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking," yep God was torturing me.

"It's okay. Now what would you like to do first, show me the house or the patients?" he asked "It's not really a big house, actually it's more of a cottage. I'll take you there so you can rest a bit and pack out. Today no patients for you, believe me you need your rest first," I said as I started to walk to the cottage, "Is that the doctor talking or the partner?" he called out, "Both" I answered with a grin.

After showing Edward the cottage which really isn't that big I led him to his room, which was right next to mine. I then went downstairs and made some tea and cut the pie that Roma gave in pieces. I was sure Edward would love the pie too and some tea would make him relax. I knew that Edward and I would become great friends.

Okay, there was an attraction but if you put that aside, I really thought he was a great guy with whom I could have fun but also long talks with. Call it a feeling, or what, but I just knew it. This was just the beginning of something beautiful.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys so here is the second chapter but first of all thank you for the lovely reviews. I was actually quite surprised with the reviews and also with the fact that a couple of people already have my story as their favorite and on alert. Thank you so much for taking this road with me. We're now getting into darker places but there are also some funny things. I hope you still like it!

Enjoy

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><p>As soon as Edward and I finished our pie he begged me to take him to the hospital, because he didn't want to rest. At first I said no because I really wanted him to rest so he could be ready for the next day, but that moment I learned one thing about Edward Cullen: He's stubborn. So I took him with me to our so called hospital.<p>

Angela and Ben also came to meet Edward, and they really seemed to hit of too. The next three days passed like that. We going to work together, healing people and in the evening we would come home and talk for hours. I was so happy that in those three days none of Edwards patients had died because I'm not sure how he would handle it. I know I had a hard time with it, but for now we were okay.

The fourth day Edward insisted I go home early "Come on, just go. I'll handle everything" but me being stubborn and all wouldn't have that of course "Edward we're partners. We work together and then we go home together." He pouted at me "Oh so you really want to work?" I nodded with a smile because I knew that I was winning this discussion, after some thinking he nodded with a smirk "Okay then, go home and make us some food. I call that work too" "But Edward-" I started arguing but he cut me of "Just go home women," he teased "Please for me? I'll just wrap it up here and be home in an hour." I huffed "Okay, whatever you want" I said as he laughed.

I went home and made us some nice food, knowing that he probably had missed homemade food since Angela every night just warmed up some food that was in the freezer. Who could blame her, we didn't have time to make food. After getting the food ready and table set up, I went to my room to wear something more comfortable, that's when Edward came home. "It smells delicious in here. I should send you home more often," he yelled from downstairs "Yeah sure! Tomorrow it's your turn," I yelled back and heard him laughing at my comment. I loved his laugh, it always put a smile on my face.

I went downstairs and saw him holding two bottles of wine "Where in the hell did you find that?" I asked surprised because it's the first time I saw alcohol in ten months. "Not in hell," he answered with a chuckle "a patient of mine arranged it. He brought it as a gift because I had 'healed' him." I took one of the bottles and kissed it "God bless him," I said as I opened the bottle and filled our glasses. Edward just smiled at my enthusiasm "Watch out doctor Cullen, tonight I'm getting you drunk" I said and winked at him. "We will see, doctor Swan" he said as we both took place at the table.

I watched his face as he took a bite of his food. He closed his eyes and moaned loudly which did very nice things to my body. "God Bella, this is amazing! I'm really sending you home more often now," I smiled and took a bite of my food too "I'm glad you like it, and I don't think that's a bad idea. Since you're here, I could sometimes come home earlier and make us some real food," he nodded "No offense but Angela's deepfreeze food was getting a bit too much" he said as he refilled our glasses. We were really drinking fast, a bit too fast actually.

After cleaning the table we took the bottles to the living room and placed it on the small table we had there. We had two sofa's, a small one and a larger one. I went to sit in the large one as Edward took the small radio we had and put on some music. "Some wine, some music and great company, what more can a man ask for?" he said with a content smile as he took place next to me.

"So Edward tell me about your family, you already know about mine" I asked because the night before he asked me to tell about my family, which was not interesting at all. "Hmm were to begin… Well, my mother Esme is a decorator. She has her own small firm that decorates houses, offices, etc. She really loves your job. You know she decorated all of our houses accept Alice and Jasper her house. Alice is a designer but she also loves decorating so she decorated her own house much to my mother's despise. Jasper is her husband, they're married for three years now but were together since high school,"

"How old is she?" I asked him "Alice is the youngest, she's only 23. She got married pretty early, not like Emmet. Emmet is the oldest of us three, he's 32 and thus 5 years older than me. You would think that as the oldest he would be the most adult one, but no he's totally not. He's like a child trapped it a body of a man, but you got to love him. Rosalie is Emmet's wife, the person to keep Emmet with his feet on the ground. She's a model with a serious attitude but once you get to know her, you'll really like her. Then there is Carlisle, my role model actually. He's also a doctor, the best doctor I know. As a child I would always look up at him, I wanted to be like him when I grow up," he said with a proud smile on his face.

I could clearly see that he loved his family very much "I would love to meet them one day," I said as I took the bottle to refill our glasses. "I would love that too Bella," he said as he looked up at me. Then one of my favorite songs started to play, hit the road Jack by Ray Charles. "Hit the road Jack and don't you come back no more, no more, no more, no more" I sang as I stood up and did some crazy moves. Edward was looking at me with a big smile,

I pulled his hand so he could dance with me "Come on this is one of my favorite songs!" I yelled. He laughed and started doing some crazy moves too. He then took one of the bottles and started singing Ray's part in a deep voice. When it was over we were both laughing hysterically and holding on to each other so we wouldn't fall over. Yep, we were already a bit tipsy. "Oh god, I haven't had that much fun in months" I said as I again went to sit on the couch.

He nodded agreeing with me and then opened the second bottle. Wait, when did we finish the first one? "So Bella, now your turn to tell. Any boyfriends or maybe girlfriends?" he joked "Yep, definitely a girlfriend," I joked back and then got serious "No, I don't have a boyfriend. I dated a couple times but didn't really found that one you know…" he nodded and came to sit next to me again as Bob Marley played on the background.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. I dated a couple of times too, actually I dated a lot but it never really clicked. I would always be happy if we got to the third date which didn't happen quite often," he said with a frown "Wow, that bad?" I asked "Yeah, there was always something missing you know" I nodded understanding completely what he was talking about.

"Bella can I ask you a question?" he asked nervously "Sure thing honey" I answered with a big smile on my face, the alcohol was really getting to me. "Why did you want to come here? What is so special about Iran?" he asked. I thought about his question and then answered honestly "Two reasons actually. First it has always been my dream to come help people in countries like these, it didn't really matter if it was Iran or Iraq, I just wanted to come because these people need us. In Seattle we have enough doctors but here we don't . In Seattle we only lose one or two people a day, here we lose tons of them because of the lack of help. I felt kind of bad working in Seattle while I could be here, helping people who really need our help," he nodded with understanding, probably having the same thoughts

"And the second reason?" he asked "Well, nothing was holding me back you know. My parents are free birds that I only saw once a year, sometimes twice and I don't have that much of friends or a boyfriend that could really keep me there. To be honest I don't think even a boyfriend could keep me there," at that he chuckled "yep, you're way too stubborn" "look who's speaking" I said to him with raised eyebrows. And then a slow song started to play, we both said "Top gun" and then looked at each other. It was the song 'take my breath away'.

Edward held out his hand for me and I silently took it. We danced in utter silence letting the beautiful song consume us. It fit perfectly you know, this man really took my breath away. Before he came I was fine but since he came I couldn't even think of living in this place on my own. It was like this was meant to be.

I was having a night mare about my past, or more specifically about him. He was hurting me badly and there was no way to run, no place to hide. I couldn't find my voice to say, or to yell something. His power had consumed me. I woke up gasping for air which made roll of the couch and fell right on top of someone. "Shit" Edward cursed with a gasp and his eyes wide open. "I'm so sorry, I was having a night mare and suddenly woke up which made fall right on top of you, and then you woke up gasping and-" I was rambling when Edward covered my mouth with his hand "Bella, if you wanted to be on top of me all you had to do was ask," he said with a smirk.

I pushed him aside and stood up. "Ass hole," I muttered and then whined when I felt a sharp pain in my head. I looked around and saw the bottles of wine which were empty now. "Hung over?" he whispered as he looked at me "Hung over" I confirmed. He stood up, took the bottles and walked to the kitchen. "Make some coffee, please" I yelled to him and then groaned because of the pain, no yelling for me anymore "Don't yell Bella" he yelled back. I laughed at the irony. I really liked this crazy man.

Edward and I got ready in silence, both drank a big cup of coffee and took some Advil. We felt a bit better. We skipped breakfast and walked straight to the hospital. "Wow, you two look amazing" Angela said the moment she saw us "Sssh you're talking too loud Ang" I said as I closed my eyes. "Are you guys hung over?" she asked very amused "Yes, now shush" I said and went inside. "Hmm Edward, I think you're having a bad influence on my best friend," Angela teased "Oh no, blame her Angela. She got me drunk, I only brought the wine" he said trying to sound as serious as possible but failing his act when he saw me laughing at him.

"Hello Bella!" both Edward and I winced at Roma's greeting. "Hey Roma, where have you been these days?" I asked since I hadn't seen her since Edwards arrival. "I have been busy with Tariq," she said with a blush which meant that things had gotten better between them. When he was injured he was slightly depressed because he couldn't do anything, all he had to was rest and that caused some tension between the two of them.

I smiled and squeezed her hand "I'm glad everything is going well between the two of you," she nodded with a smile "Oh sorry Edward" I said because I forgot to introduce them "Roma this is Edward, the new doctor. Edward this is Roma, a good friend of mine. The one that made the great pie," I said as they shook hands "Nice to meet you Roma and you're a great cook, I loved your pie!" Edward said with a big smile. "Great then you will love the food I brought. I made some lunch" she said as she handed me and Angela a plate.

We both thanked her "Ben will love it Roma, thank you so much" Angela said. "I love to cook for you guys, you know that. Anyway, I need to get going. I promised I would bring Tariq some lunch too" She said as she started walking to the door "Say hi to Tariq from us" I said as Angela nodded. "Will do," she said and left.

"How come that she speaks English so well?" asked Edward "She's the town teacher. She learned English when she was a child. She only stayed here because of Tariq, her husband otherwise she would have gone to London, her dream city" I explained. "Why don't they move to London then?" "Because Tariq doesn't want to leave. He won't be able to live somewhere else," Angela answered and I nodded agreeing with her. "Too bad for her," Edward said with a frown "Anyway I'm going to start on my rounds," Edward said and asked if I was coming too.

"Uh Bella can you stay here for a second, I want to ask something," Edward understood that this was something private and left the room. "Can you do that check-up now, I want to be 100% sure that I'm pregnant" Angela said as I mentally slapped myself, I had totally forgotten it. "Sorry, I totally forgot. Come on I'll do it now". After doing the check-up Angela looked nervously at me "And?" she asked.

I couldn't keep the grin of my face and hugged her "You're going to be a mommy!" I cried and then winced, this headache was really killing but I didn't care at the moment, my best friend was pregnant! "Aaaaaaaaaaaaah!" Angela screamed as she hugged me tightly. Edward ran in looking very panicked "Are you guys ok?" Angela and I looked at each other and started giggling "Yes Edward, were absolutely fine!" I answered. Edward looked at us like we had grown three heads and then shrugged and left the room.

Edward and I both did our rounds and then went home to have the lunch Roma brought us. "The next time you're getting me drunk, let me now" he joked, "Hey, first of all you were the one who brought the wine and secondly I did tell you that I was going to get you drunk" I teased back. "I did have a great night you know. It was nice to have some fun after working so much" I told him meaning every single word I said "Yeah me too, and I'm really happy to be here too because not only is my dream coming true too but I also got the opportunity to work with you," he said with feeling in his voice.

The conversation was becoming a bit too serious so I decided to tease him " and to get drunk" he laughed at my answer and confirmed it "yeah, and to get drunk". Suddenly someone banged on our door "Doctor Bella!" I recognized Roma's voice, she sounded in panic so something must be wrong. Edward and I both ran to the door a bit panicked too. When I opened the door I noticed Roma was crying and breathing heavily probably because she ran to our house "Roma, take a deep breath and relax" I said so she could tell us what was going on.

She started taking deep breaths which calmed her a bit "Good girl, now tell me what's wrong?" I asked her "You have to come immediately! People are dying" she cried. "But why? Was there an attack?" Edward asked trying to stay calm "Yes, an attack. There was an attack, a big attack. They are bringing everyone to the hospital now" Roma said as she started sobbing again "Okay Roma, we will take care of that. You just go home and don't go outside. Take deep breaths and try to relax," I said and gave her a hug. She nodded and then ran away.

Edward and I ran to the hospital and saw that things were really crazy in there. People were running, crying, some were yelling for help. We started with the patients who had the worst injuries. We were busy for hours trying to save each patient. I had already lost three patients because there wounds were just too bad, it was impossible for them to survive.

I stayed focused on my job and didn't let the pain get to me. The pain of losing someone is something you really never get over. Edward was actually doing a great job, he stayed calm all the while and worked as fast and as good as possible. To me it seemed like he was doing it way more better than me. After exactly three hours we were almost finished when they brought a patient with serious injuries.

I needed Edward to help me because otherwise we would lose him too. I looked for him and saw him giving CPR to a small girl. "Come on breath!" he yelled as he tried harder. I checked the girls pulse and find out that the girl was already dead. "Edward let go of her, she's not with us anymore" I said as I placed my hand on his hand. He pushed it away "No, no she's not dead," he shook his head not accepting it and trying harder to get her to breath "please" he whispered. I took a deep breath and then pulled him away from the girl.

"I need your help with a patient over there Edward. If you don't come now, he will die too. It's too late we can't save her anymore," I whispered the last part as I looked him in the eye. He nodded and then followed me. We had saved our last patient thank god, I don't think we both could have handled losing him too. That night after doing an extra round we went home exhausted. Edward didn't say a word the whole time. He just went to his room as soon as we were home.

I let him be alone for some time and took a shower. After getting dressed I decided to check on Edward and found him sitting in a corner of his room. He was crying silently. It broke my heart to see him like that. I took him in my arms and let him cry silently "Shhh, you're okay. You did what you had to do" at that he started sobbing so hard that his whole body was shaking. I held him closer to me as my own tears fell too.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The next day I woke up after sleeping for only two hours. I putted Edward in his bed but stayed awake till two hours ago, then I went to my bed to get some sleep too. I felt really bad for Edward but a part of me felt good too because he was not going through this alone, he had me.

I made some coffee and breakfast and waited for Edward to come. I didn't wake him because I thought he would need his sleep after his breakdown, and my thoughts were confirmed when Edward came down an half hour later looking like hell.

"Good morning" I said with a smile but all I got was a nod. "Coffee?" I asked as I got up to fix him a cup of coffee but stopped when he shook his head and headed to the door "No thanks, I'm going to the hospital," he said coldly and then left before I could answer.

I felt my heart broke in to small pieces when he closed that door. He was pushing me away. I felt the tears in my eyes but then got angry at myself for even crying over such a thing. I knew that this was just temporary and that Edward was just feeling bad and that after a couple of days he would be back to his normal self.

As I convinced myself that Edward would be fine after some time at the hospital I went upstairs and took a shower. After getting dressed I also headed to the hospital.

I finished my round quickly and was pretty happy with the process my patients were making. They were starting to get better which made me almost forget the events of yesterday, but not fully.

After searching for an half hour for Edward to ask if he was coming home with me to have lunch, I decided to go home and see if he had maybe left early to make some lunch, or to rest.

Those were actually ideas I thought of to convince myself that Edward was fine and not in pain. But as I stepped out of the hospital I saw Edward sitting next to Angela with a cigarette in his hand. But the fact that was hurting me the most was that he was talking to her, and not only a word or two, but they were having a real conversation going on. I could see it by the way they were talking.

There was a part of me that was saying that I should be happy that he was not just sitting in a corner and crying out his guts, like I did the first time I had lost someone during those attacks.

But there was also a big part of me that was jealous of the fact that he would actually talk to her and not to me. I had lost my appetite and decide to just stay in the hospital so I could be close to my patients.

The next days passed like that; Edward wouldn't talk to me except if I asked a question but he would only answer in a word of two, and he avoided me like the plague.

I didn't see him talking to Angela any more, in fact he didn't talk to anyone except again if he was asked a question.

I was dying in the inside and it was starting to show on the outside. Angela and Ben were worried about me but said nothing. They were probably afraid of my reaction if they did actually asked what was wrong.

After a week I had enough of it. I had left early from the hospital and waited for Edward to come home like I always did if I left earlier. When Edward entered the house he didn't even look at me and went right to the stairs to go upstairs but I stopped him.

"Stop, don't even think about it. You're not going upstairs before listening to me," he stopped but didn't even bother to turn around to look at me which angered me even more. "At least turn around and look at me," I yelled in despair.

He did as I said and watched me with the same green eyes I saw the first time I looked at him but the difference was that those eyes were now empty. My voice softened automatically the moment I looked at his face.

"I miss you Edward. I understand that this is hard for you but I'm here for you, don't you see that. I can't sense what you're feeling unless you tell me Edward. And please do tell me because as much as you're hurting so am i. It really hurts me to see you like this, and the fact that you aren't talking to me is killing me. So Edward, is there anything you want to talk to me about?" I asked as sweet as possible trying to get him to open up for him.

He stared at me for a while, "No Bella, I have nothing to say" he said his voice sounding so empty. I don't know why but that was the final straw and I exploded.

"Don't you understand that you will only lose yourself is you keep all this feelings bottled up? Maybe you don't but I do okay. When I went through that I had no one Edward, no one to talk to, not even Angela. I was on my own and I wasn't sure I would be able to go through, I even thought of leaving. But look at me, I am still here because I was able to let those feelings go! I'm losing you, every second of the day you're pulling away. I hate it, I want the Edward back I first met! Please do something, cry, talk whatever you want but just do it. Talk to Angela if you want but just come back, please." I didn't even realize I was crying until he lifted his hand and wiped my tears away.

I thought I had cracked him but those thoughts flew out of the window when he looked at me with those eyes and whispered "Good night Bella" and then he turn around and went to his room.

I didn't sleep that night. I sat on the floor in front of the stairs and waited for Edward to come downstairs and to talk to me. To hold me and tell me that we would be fine. But that didn't happen and this time I was the first one to leave in the morning.

I went to the hospital and started my round ignoring the looks my patients and the nurses were giving me. I probably looked horrible but hey who cared?

I didn't even bother to look if Edward had arrived or not, if he didn't want to talk to me then I wasn't going to push him either.

At lunch Angela took me with her outside and started questioning me "What in the hell is going on with you? You look like hell and you haven't said a word today" "I'm fine Ang, just had a bad night," I said lying or no not lying, hiding the truth because I did have a bad night.

"Does this has to do something with Edward?" she asked sounding concerned but I quickly assured her that everything between Edward and me was fine. Angela was pregnant so I didn't want to worry her. "Ang, I'm fine. Promise" I said trying to convince her.

"Look why don't you and Edward come have dinner at our place tonight? We could talk and have some fun," she offered. "I'm not sure Edward will want to come," I said with a sigh. "Okay, but just make sure you come, okay?" I nodded with a fake smile not wanting to worry her more.

Angela told me that Ben asked Edward to come have dinner with them but that Edward had politely declined. I knew he wouldn't come but I guess a part of me still had hope.

While Ben was setting up the table, me and Angela were working in the kitchen. She asked me to cut some vegetables while she was preparing the meat. I was thinking about Edward when I suddenly felt a sharp pain in my left hand which made me cry out in pain.

Ben and Angela were immediately at my side "Oh my god Bella, what did you do?" Angela cried out in fear, I rolled my eyes at her as I searched for something to cover my hand. "It's nothing Angela, just a stupid cut" but Angela being Angela decided that she wouldn't let it go and asked me to show her hand.

"Just a cut? Look at how deep it is Bella" when I looked at it I realized that it in fact was pretty deep but still I could take care of it. "Ben go get Edward" Angela said as she gave me a towel to put on my hand. "That is not necessary, I can take care of myself," I said but Ben had already left. "Bella, don't be so stubborn. Let Edward take care of you, you can't take care of yourself in this position"

Suddenly I wasn't in Angela's house anymore, I was back in his house. He was looking at me with a smirk on his face "You can't take care of yourself Bella, remember that. But that's why I'm here, I'll always take care of you," he said as he started healing my wounds which he had created himself.

"No, leave me! I can take care of myself. Please don't do it, please James don't do it. Nooo please don't do it, it hurts," he silenced me as he covered my mouth with his hand "Sssh, Bella I'll take care of you, only me," he said while staring in to my eyes with his dark eyes.

"Please" I begged and then everything around me went black.

When I woke up I felt a hand stroking my face. It felt warm and nice. It felt home. Suddenly I remembered that Edward was not talking to me so who was this. I shot up and looked around trying to figure out what was going out.

I relaxed the moment I laid my eyes on Edward "What are you doing here?" I asked softly but then wondered how I got here "Or wait scratch that, how did I get here?" he sighed and looked at me nervously.

"Bella you really scared me last night," he whispered softly hurt clear in his voice. "I thought I had lost you for a moment," "What in the hell are you talking about?" I said trying to put everything together but not able to. "You had a panic attack. When I got there you weren't with us anymore or actually you mentally weren't with us anymore."

"James" I whispered because I suddenly remember having a dream about him. Edward nodded at that name "Yes you kept saying his name but you were begging him not to hurt you. Bella what is going on? Talk to me about it" he begged suddenly remembering me that the day before I was the one who was begging him to talk to me.

"Oh so now you're asking me to talk to you?" I asked him in a calm voice "Bella this is not about me. Let's talk about that later, please. I need to know why you had a panic attack. I can't see you in that state" he said in pain.

"I couldn't see you in that state either Edward but you didn't care about my feelings, knowing that I was already hurting then. Do I really need to have a panic attack to get you to talk to me?" I asked irritated "Bella please don't be like this, I promise you I will explain. And I hate myself for hurting you I really do, and seeing in that state yesterday made it worse believe me" he said and when I looked in his eyes I knew he meant every word he said.

"Hey, it's okay," I said as I stroked his cheek "No Bella it's not okay" he said and pushed my hand away. I took his face in my hand so he would look at me "You're right it's not okay, but we're going to talk and then everything will be okay, okay?" he looked at me and nodded.

"I'm sorry I pushed you away Bella" he said as he took place next to me on my bed. "Why though?" I asked as I took hold of his hand. "I was ashamed of myself" he said which made me look at him in shock "I don't understand. Why would you be ashamed?" He looked away "Bella I broke down in front of you after trying to be the strong one, I broke down in front of you. Do you even know how humiliating that was for me?" he said his voice broken because of his anger for himself.

"Edward look at me" I said in a stern voice but he didn't move so I repeated myself but a bit louder "look at me" this time he looked at me and it broke my heart to see him with tears in his eyes "Loosing that girl was the final straw Bella. I have never lost so many people in my life" he said in a whisper as I watched a tear fall from his eyes.

I wiped it away and squeezed his hand "That's the hard part of our job Edward, we will have to deal with that a lot of times. It doesn't get easier but we will be better at letting those feelings not bottle up. That may sound stupid but it's true. The first time I went through that was hell for me. I didn't know anyone back then, not even Angela and I had to deal with it alone. You know I only broke down after 4 days, but I broke down bad," I told as my tears started to fall too.

"I didn't mean to push you away, I just couldn't talk to you. I didn't know what to do, but seeing you like that…God Bella, I don't know what went through me, but I was sort of back you know?" he said trying to explain his feeling without sounding too crazy.

"So you needed me to have a panic attack to get back to normal. Great, I'll remember for the next time," Edward chuckled darkly at my response "No Bella it wasn't the panic attack, it was the thought of losing you, of not having you around. But I didn't lose you, I have you still around and every moment I have with you is important to me. I want to enjoy and spend every moment I have with you."

"Me too Edward. You know I almost want to thank god for giving me that panic attack, it brought you back to me," I said teasingly and it made him smile too "Only you Bella, only you." He said with a grin.

Which reminded me how much I had missed seeing him smile "You should smile more often," I said as I looked at him with a frown. "So should you" he murmured. I smiled at him and watched as his smile grew bigger.

"So about the panic attack?" he asked in a soft voice. "Do you really want to know?" I asked unsure "Bella I want to know if you want to tell me about it, but if you're not ready then I can wait, but I'm not sure if I will be able to hold up for a whole week before exploding" he teased.

"Not funny mister, and I think I can tell" I told him "Remember you don't have too," he said but i waved that thought away the moment I said that. "I want you to know but please don't get mad just think of me being here with you, all happy and laughing. Okay?" I knew what I said would get him mad but still. "I promise Bella." He said and squeezed my hand letting me know that he was there for me.

"The first year of college I was studying literature together with my boyfriend James who I had met there. He was a strange guy but maybe that was what had appealed to me, I'm not sure actually. He was always obsessed with taking care of me but I never took it seriously. After a while he started showing his real side. He would hurt me and then he would take care of my wounds saying that I only had him to take care of him. I believed him. I let him hurt me and take care of me.

One day he was hurting but I had enough of him so I was screaming to get help but no one heard me or at least that's what I thought. Suddenly my father busted through the door. James hadn't hear him because of my cries and neither had I but suddenly James was pulled away from me. You can imagine what my father did to him.

I started therapy and stuff and that was also the year that I decided that I wanted to become a doctor." I said finishing my story. Edward was sitting there with clenched teeth, so I gave him some time to pull his thoughts together. This was also the first time I had told this without crying, I was proud of myself.

"What happened to James?" he asked after a while. "He is dead" I said which caused him to look at me with raised eyebrows "He got killed in jail. I don't know what exactly happened, all I know is that he was killed in jail," I said not caring about him at all.

"Bella I don't know what to say. I'm so sorry you had to deal with this," he said in a pained voice. "Edward I'm fine, really I'm over it" I said trying to assure him that I was fine. "Must I remind you of the attack you had yesterday night Bella?" he said sarcastically.

"No Edward you don't have to" I said as I glared at him. "It was just because of all the tension. It was too much and when Angela said I couldn't take care of myself I flipped" I said trying to assure him that I was fine now. "Bella I'm sorry, I feel so guilty about this" he said looking away.

"What the hell! You didn't cut me with the knife Edward, I'm the klutz" I said as I got up "But I created the tension" he said stubbornly. "Oh would you just get it over with," I said as I opened the door so I could go downstairs.

"Wait Bella, before we go downstairs I want to make sure everything between is ok" Edward said as he came to stand in front of me. "Well there's only one thing you can do to make it up to me," I said looking away with a fake sigh.

"I'll do anything" he said in a desperate voice which made me giggle "I just want a hug Edward" as soon the words left my mouth I was crushed into Edwards chest. I smiled to myself because I was back home.

After a long and very needed hug both Edward and I went downstairs to have some breakfast, but neither of us had showered so I decided that I would make breakfast while Edward could take a relaxing shower.

"You go take a shower and I'll make us some breakfast," I said as we entered the kitchen but Edward shook his head "No please I'll make breakfast, you go take a shower" he said but I quickly declined

"No Edward, I'll make us breakfast while you take a shower." I said starting to get irritated.

"No Bella, I'll make us breakfast while YOU take a shower" he said as he pointed a finger to me.

We both glared at each other. "Edward!" I said through gritted teeth and got the same response from him, except he said my name "Bella!".

We stood there glaring at each other, neither of us moving. After some time we suddenly started laughing at the irony of our fight.

Soon we were laughing hysterically, all the while holding on to each other so we wouldn't fall.

We were absolutely perfect for each other!

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><p>Let me now what you think!<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

It took me some time to post but i was going through some stuff that was holding me back. sorry!

Well this chapter is dedicated to at the moment my only reviewer A is for Angel, but i do hope that there are more people who would to love to leave me a review.

I would really love to hear your thoughts on my story!

This said, we continue...

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><p>Chapter 4<p>

"No Edward this really is not going to work" I said stubbornly as I shook my head. "Oh come on Bella, you can't be serious. Think about it" he pleaded. "No Edward, we tried but it's not working. I'm sorry" I said as I pushed him away.

"It's not fair Bella. You and I can both cook in the same kitchen" he said as he held on to the door and then looked at me with a smile "by the way you're pretty strong for a woman but also very stubborn."

"Edward the last time you and I cooked together our food burned, and the time before that you dropped the pasta sauce. Please you just go inside and let me work in the kitchen because only then we will have real food," I said with a sigh

He looked at me with a smirk "Okay I may not be good at cooking but believe me there are things I am good at," I looked at him in shock "Edward Cullen how dare you!" I said in disbelief all the while blushing.

"If it's not true then why are you still holding on to me?" he said still smirking which caused me to push him harder "You are one crazy man and just so you know I'm just holding on to you so I can get you out of the kitchen" I said knowing that I wasn't making sense with whatever I was saying.

Finally I got him out of the kitchen but found it hard to take my hands of his shoulders. After all he did have an amazing body to which I wanted to do unimaginable things. Those thoughts made me blush harder and of course he noticed that.

"Thinking naughty about me Doctor Swan?" he asked in a sexy voice but I wouldn't let him get the upper hand so I decided to play it of "Please when there are people like Julian McMahon and Brad Pitt, why would I think naughty of you" I said waving him away.

He walked to me with this devilish but sexy look on his face and then whispered "Because I'm way sexier and hotter than them," he said his hot breath all over my face. Suddenly something else took my attention away "Hey what's that smell?"

He looked away with a frown which got me to clear my head, and that's how I remembered that there still was chicken in the oven "Shit, the chicken!" I yelled as I ran to the oven. I took the chicken out but it didn't look edible anymore. I huffed angrily and glared at Edward, who was laughing so hard that he had to hold on to the encounter.

"I hate you" I said still glaring at him, he just kept laughing. "Fine! You just starve tonight," I said as I walked out of the kitchen. He followed me still laughing lightly. "I promise the next time I won't interfere between you and your cooking" he said sincerely but unable to hold his grin away.

To be honest I wasn't really mad at him, I just wanted him to think I was mad at him. After some while he thought I was really mad and started begging for me to forgive him "Bella, I promise that from now on I will stay out of the kitchen. Please don't be mad at me. Please, please, please, please" he pouted.

"Well if you promise to always eat my food, and afterwards compliment my cooking and then clean the table, I forgive you" I said teasingly but sounding absolutely serious. He nodded enthusiastically "I promise"

I laughed at his enthusiasm and walked to the kitchen to see if there was a part of the chicken that was edible. Fortunately only the outside was burned so I cut that of and put the chicken together with some potatoes on the table. After that I called Edward to come eat.

We had a nice dinner with small talk and some lazy jokes from Edward, but it were moments like this that I loved the most. After Edward cleaned the table and washed the dishes –after a huge discussion that I shouldn't do it because I had done already so much, I of course disagreed but yeah he won-we went inside and decided to watch some TV.

Suddenly the rain caught my eye. It was raining so hard outside and if there is one thing that I absolutely love, it is hard rain. I stood up and took Edwards hand "Do you trust me?" I said as I walked to the door. "Sometimes," he said teasingly.

I opened the door and started walking outside when Edward stopped me "Um Bella, what are you doing? It's raining" he said as if it wasn't obvious "No really?" I responded sarcastically. He looked at me with raised eyebrows probably trying to figure what was going through my head.

I let go of his hand and ran into the rain. I loved the feeling of the hard droplets on my skin. They were hard, cold but so free. It made me feel free. I started to swirl with a big smile on my face and my eyes closed "Bella come back! Are you crazy?" Edward yelled from inside.

"No, you come! This is life, believe me" I yelled back still swirling around. "Bella, please for my sake come inside. You will get sick" he said in a rushed voice. I stopped to look at him and sighed. It put my hands on my hip and raised my eyebrows. After a while he started to look uncomfortable "Stop looking like that, you're making me feel uncomfortable" he mumbled.

"Then get here," I yelled but then added in a soft voice "please for me? You'll really enjoy this". "I have definitely lost my mind" he muttered but then joined me. I took hold of his hand and started to swirl with him, or actually I tried to that but he still wouldn't budge.

I again stopped to look at him and saw him looking at me with this strange look in his eyes that I just couldn't describe. I sighed and put my hand over his eyes "What are you doing?" he asked surprised but didn't push my hand away, he just kept still. "Sssh, be quiet and trust me" I said as I hushed him, he nodded silently "Now just enjoy. Feel free and let the rain take you away" I said in a whisper as I closed my own eyes.

I took my hand of his eyes but kept my eyes closed. After some silence I heard Edward breathing heavily so I opened my eyes and looked at him, he was again looking at me with that strange look "What is it?" I whispered, "Bella I…" he started and I don't know why but I got the feeling that he wanted to tell something very important.

"Bella I'm freezing" he continued with a laugh. I chuckled slightly but still wondered if that was what he really wanted to stay. I took his hand and led him inside "What now?" he asked as I closed the door. I looked at him and smiled at his eagerness "Now you go take a hot shower, your body will feel like it's on fire. It's amazing," I explained enthusiastically probably because of the images of Edward standing in a shower, naked. I shook my head to clear my head.

Edward put his hand on my forehead and then took it away "Strange" he said with a frown. "What?" I asked curiously, "You don't have a fever" he joked. I pushed him away and walked upstairs "Jerk" I muttered on my way up. All I got as a response was a laugh.

After taking a shower I got dressed and was leaving my room when suddenly my phone went off. Strange because no one would call me at this hour. The screen read 'chief' which putted a big smile on my face. I answered immediately "Chief!" he chuckled at my enthusiasm "Hello Bella, it's nice to know that you're happy to have a call from me"

"Of course chief, I'm always happy to talk to you" I said and it was true because to me he was more like a father than a boss. "Well instead of talking on the phone we could talk face to face" he told me.

"I don't understand what you're trying to say chief," I answered with confusion, "What I'm trying to say is that you have been in Iran for a while so I was thinking that you could come home for a couple weeks. We have some volunteers who would love to stand in for you" he explained.

I didn't know what to think about it. It was a great opportunity to see some friends and maybe even my parents, but did I really want to leave Edward? I hated the idea of leaving him but still "Chief, I don't know, I mean I love it here" I said still confused about it. "Don't decide now honey, take your time. Call me when you've made a decision" I was happy that he was giving me that chance.

"Thanks chief," I said as thoughts of leaving and staying swirled in my head. "You're welcome and Bella?" "Yeah" I said softly. "Please think about it" he said, worry clear in his voice. "I will" I answered honestly and then we both said goodbye and hung up.

I sighed and decided to ask what Edward thought of it.

When I walked to Edwards room I was thinking how I would approach the situation. I opened the door and froze when I saw a naked Edward standing in front of his closet. I put my hands in front of my eyes and started rambling, because that's what I do when I'm nervous.

"Oh my god, I'm so sorry! I really didn't see anything" except for your perfect butt I thought but decided to keep that to myself "I just came in to ask you something and forgot to knock and then suddenly you're there standing in your birth costume. I'm really sorry, I should have knocked. Oh god, this is so embarrassing."

Suddenly my hands were taken away from my eyes by his hand but I didn't dare to open my eyes. He chuckled and then said that I could open my eyes. "But you…no clothes…I" I didn't know what to say and on top of that I was stuttering like a schoolgirl who had a crush on her hot history teacher.

"Hot history teacher?" he asked amused. Shit that meant I had said that out loud. "Well there was this teacher in ninth grade who was really hot" I said but had no idea why I was telling him that. I had embarrassed myself enough already.

He started laughing which annoyed me to no end. "I'm leaving" I said as I turned around. "Bella sorry, I was joking and I'm dressed now" he said quickly. I turned around slowly and opened only one eye. I looked him up and down and then let out breath of relief when I saw that he was fully dressed.

"Do I really look that bad?" Edward said sounding offended. "No, but I… I was…I…Ugh" I was going crazy because I didn't know what to do or what to say without embarrassing myself. He smiled at me "I was joking Bella" "Of course you were" I muttered under my breath but he somehow had heard it and smirked at me.

After watching some TV both Edward and I went to bed without discussing anything. We just forgot what had happened in his room and talked about different things. But I had totally forgotten what I really wanted to talk to him about.

The next day went smoothly at the hospital. There were no attacks and the patients were getting better and better.

Edward was getting better too, the more people got better the more I saw Edward smile. But it also scared me for the next attack because as much as I wished it wouldn't happen, those attacks always happened. We needed a miracle to stop it and that miracle was not called Bella or Edward, so we did the only thing we could. We healed them, or at least we tried.

That afternoon Angela invited me and Edward for dinner. She said that she wanted to have a great evening with us that would make her forget the last even that had happened in her house. Yep, that was not nice. We of course said yes and after work we immediately went to her house because we were absolutely starving.

"Make us some amazing food woman" Ben teased as he grabbed some beer out of the fridge and then kissed Angela on the cheek. I didn't even know he had beer. He gave one to me and Edward, Angela was pregnant so she was stuck with soda or juice.

Angela was making the food as I talked to Edward. She didn't want me working in her kitchen because she was scared I would cut myself again. I promised her I wouldn't but that woman was stubborn too so that left me to do nothing.

"You know yesterday was actually pretty nice. I had never done that before" Edward said and I knew that he was talking about us standing in the rain. "Yeah, me and my father used to do that a lot but my mother, Renee, would always get mad because as a child I got sick easily. And yes almost every time I did got sick but I still did it because it makes me feel free. After while god probably decided that sickness wasn't going to stop me from swirling in the rain so I didn't get sick anymore. Or at least not every time," I told as I remembered those good times.

"I have actually never heard you talking to your parents" Edward said with a frown. "I did," I quickly defended myself, "Oh yeah? When was the last time you talked to them?" I looked down guiltily and then mumbled "three months". "What was that?" Edward acted as though he didn't hear me.

"Ugh yeah, it's true okay. I haven't talked to them in three months" I was frustrated because he was right it was not the good thing to do on my behalf. "It's just I feel like they're better off without me" I said looking away from him.

"I don't understand why you would say that" Edward said confused. I sighed as I told him that my mother was only sixteen when she got me and that she had to give up everything because of me. "I was happy to be eighteen because as much as I loved travelling I wanted to settle down in a place of my own. They of course wanted to travel and who am I to stop them. They should be able to enjoy their life and if they didn't have me, things would have been way better for them."

"So you're actually saying that you're a mistake they made in their teenage years?" He asked as if he was trying to get the story straight. I nodded because I really thought that was true. "Bella that's insane" he scoffed which surprised me because he was calm through the entire story.

"I'm absolutely sure that they love you and miss you. They're your parents. Did they even really said that you were a mistake?" I frowned at that but shook my head "Well no but-" he cut me off before I could argue.

"You're not a mistake. You're their baby girl who has grown into this wonderful and beautiful woman," he said in a determinate voice and I don't know how but somehow I believed him. "You think I'm beautiful?" I asked him though that wasn't what this was about, but still.

"Yes I do. You're absolutely beautiful Bella" he said in a soft voice "And no buts!" he added strictly. But the only part I got of that was buts, or actually more like butts because I started laughing when I thought of what had happened in his room and I saw his butt.

"What are you laughing about?" Edward asked worried, probably for my sanity. "When you said no buts, I had to think of yesterday when I saw your butt," I explained and then blushed. "I thought you said that you didn't see anything" he said in disbelief. I shook my head still laughing, soon Edward joined me.

"What are you two laughing about?" Angela asked as she stirred the spaghetti sauce. "Nothing" I said and waved it off with a laugh. She shook her head and smiled at us.

Suddenly Edwards phone rang. He looked at the screen and said "It's Alice" and then went outside to talk.

"Who is Alice?" Angela asked probably thinking that it was his girlfriend. Hell even I would think that. I mean look at the man, he's one hot piece! "She's his little sister. Very sweet actually. I talked to her once and she really cares about Edward and she also misses him a lot." Angela nodded with understanding.

"Bella there is actually something I want to tell. Since Ben is watching TV and Edward is outside we have some time alone," Angela said as she came to stand next to me. "What is it?" I asked curiously because when Angela had something to tell it was definitely important.

"I told Ben about the pregnancy and he's really happy but-" Angela got cut off by Edward who walked in looking like he had seen a ghost. I ran immediately to his side and asked what was wrong.

He looked confused as if he didn't understand the question but then frowned and looked in me in the eyes "My parents…they had an accident" he whispered with pain in his voice.

Angela and I both gasped when we heard this. I didn't know what to say and just stared at him. "Is it bad?" Angela asked him when she knew I wouldn't be able to bring it out. All I wanted to do was to hold him and assure him that he would be fine. But I couldn't.

"It's actually pretty bad" Edward answered sounding lost. I snapped out of my lostness and hugged him. "Edward I'm so sorry" I whispered in his ear. He hugged me tightly but said nothing. "We should go home so you can pack and go to Portland" I said which caused him to pull back and look at me with hope.

"You wouldn't mind it if I went?" he said surprised which annoyed me. Was I heartless or something? "Of course I won't! Edward I would actually mind it if you didn't went" I said annoyed that he would think that "Of course I'm going to go but what about you?" he said with worry.

"I'll be fine Edward, you just go to your parents" I said softly. He nodded and then went to call the airlines to get a ticket.

He had an flight in two hours, so we went home quickly. He only took his passport and jacket "Aren't you going to take some clothes with you?" I asked as we sat on the porch in front of our house, we were waiting for the taxi the come.

"No, I have some clothes in my house at Portland" Edward said and I don't know why but I was happy that he didn't call it his home. I loved the fact that Edward thought this was our home. I smiled at him.

"I wish I could take you with me Bella. With you I feel like I can take on the world," he said as he looked at me with that strange look. Again! "Me too" I answered to both sentences.

When the taxi arrived we hugged each other and didn't let go for a while. "Promise to call me. I'm worried about them too" I said as I was still holding on to him.

"I'll call everyday" he answered as he kissed my cheek, not in a romantic way but in a supporting way. Edward was letting me know that he was here for me even though he wasn't.

I pulled back after a time and watched him walk to the taxi. He looked back at me once and then closed the door. When the car pulled away I suddenly got an idea.

I ran to my room to get my phone and called my chief. He answered after two rings.

"Chief it's me Bella. Can you send two volunteers here a.s.a.p.?"

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><p>Love it? Hate it? Please do tell me<p>

Reviews are better than a naked Edward...(Oh who am I kidding!) but still :D


	5. Chapter 5

Here I'm with the next chapter but first of all thanks for the lovely reviews you guys! I hope you guys like this chapter.

So we continue

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><p>The chief was delighted when he heard that I was coming but I was even happier when told me that Kate and Garret, the two doctors who also were a married couple would come the next day.<p>

When they came I showed them around and also introduced them to Angela and Ben so they wouldn't feel alone. After saying bye to Angela and Ben, I immediatly left to the airport.

I was so nervous that I couldn't sleep on the flight from Iran to Seattle. After landing in Seattle I rented a car and drove to Portland, I didn't need sleep, yet.

Edward didn't knew that I was coming, I had just called him and asked in which hospital they were and how his parents were.

I could hear by his voice that he hadn't slept since he landed in Portland. I so wanted to hold him and rock him back and forth till he would fall in a deep sleep.

When I parked my car in front of the hospital I took a deep breath and then walked inside.

Edward had told me that they were staying on the seventh floor so I didn't had to ask anyone for information, but I didn't knew in which room they were, but I decided that I would ask a nurse on the seventh floor.

When I walked out of the elevator I looked around and then suddenly froze when I heard his voice "Alice, Emmet, we need to decide now. Max wants an answer" he sighed in frustration.

"Dude you're the doctor. You should know if they should do it or not" I could hear by Emmets voice that he was frustated too, but not because he didn't knew the answer but because he felt helpless.

"I'm not sure, okay. I'm not thinking clearly and I don't want to make the wrong the choice" he sounded so defeated it litteraly broke my heart.

"Uhm guys, there is this girl looking at us with a strange expression. She looks like she's about to breakdown or runaway" Alice said as she looked at me with a frown.

Edward and Emmet turned around and looked at me. Edwards expression suddenly changed into one of shock "Bella?" he breathed. If I didn't saw his lips moving I wouldn't know he was saying something.

I didn't really know what to say "Uhm surprise?" I said lamely and tried to smile but it probably came of as a grimace.

"Is that Bella?" Alice asked excitedly but Edward totally ignored her and walked straight to me. When he stood in front of me he took me in his arms and embraced me thightly "I'm so happy that you're here" He breathed into my ear.

"Me too" I whispered as I held on to him for dear life. "I didn't know he was dating" I heard Emmet say to Alice but heard no response. I was surprised when Edward suddenly pulled back "But what about the patients? Oh my god don't tell me they are all dead? How could you let them alone" he rambled on and on.

I let him talk until he was finished "Are you done?" I asked him with a pointed look, he nodded. "No Edward they are not dead, I mean come on seriously, why would they all be dead? And do you really think I left them alone? My chief offered me to come back and he sended two volunteers to stand in for us" I explained as he sighed.

"I'm sorry for my brother Bella. This is absolute evidence that he has lost his mind," Alice said as se joined us. Edward glared at her but she just shrugged it off "I'm so happy to finally meet you" she said and then hugged me thightly.

"Me too" I answered "and I'm so sorry about you're parents" when Alice let go of me, Emmet took me in his arms "Hi Bella...Hmm Bella? Bello...Bellsy...Bellie, aha yes Bellie. From now on I'm going to call you Bellie" I looked at him in shock, I mean I hated nick names but that was just crazy.

"Ah leave the girl alone, i bet she already wants to go back to Iran" Edward said as he took hold of me. "No, I'm fine and it's really nice to meet you guys, too bad it's in these circumstances" I really felt bad for them.

"Bella, is that you?" I heard a voice and when I looked up I saw a good friend of mine who was also a doctor "Hey Max, long time no see" I said as I smiled at him but stayed at Edwards side because I didn't want to leave him.

"I thought you were in Iran?" he asked "Well yeah I was" I answered the same time Edward asked "You two know each other?" "Yes, Max and I went to college together" I answered.

"So Edward, have you guys made a decision about the operation?" Max asked them but of what I had heard they hadn't made a decision so I wanted to help.

"No we haven't" Edward answered in irritation, "Uhm would you guys mind if I could take a look at the file and help?" I asked, "I think that's an excellent idea!" Edward said enthusiastically.

"Yeah sure" Max answered but he didn't sound very convincing. "Guys you go to dad's room while we talk about mom, okay?" Edward asked Emmet and Alice.

"Sure, but let us know what you decide okay?" Emmet asked and Edward nodded.

We walked to Max's office and took a seat. "So can you first fill me in on Esme's status?" I asked them both. "Mrs. Cullen got hit right under her intestines which is where we have to operate her but the huge risk is that we could cut her intestines without even noticing, and if we notice it too late we could lose her" Max explained as he opened the file and gave it to me.

"There's 45 procent of her surviving" Edward added miserably. A stomach operation was always hard, not a lot of people survive a stomach operation. I went trough Esme's file and then suddenly came up with an idea.

"Guys listen to this, what if we do the operation but don't stitch her up so in case we did cut her we could take care of it as soon as possible without first having to open it?" I told them still thinking it trough

"How long are we going to let it open?" Max asked intrested "We should test her blood every hour and if in 6 hours there's no change, we can stitch her up and then awake her" I answered and to be honest I kind of like the idea, because with this we didn't have that much risk.

"I think that's a great idea! Let's do it, I'm up for it" Edward said and for the first timeI saw him smile genuinly, I smiled back at him. "Let me run it trough with the chief, I want to hear his thoughts too" Max said "But I must say Bella it is a great idea" he added.

"Thanks" I took Edwards hand in mine and squeezed it to let him know I was there for him. "Okay then, I"ll let you guys know when the decision is been made" Max said as he stood up. Edward and I nodded and then went outside. "You must be tired" he murmered as he stroked my cheek.

"Oh really? Tell me honestly Edward, did you sleep from the moment you came to Portland?" I asked him and he looked down without answering my question, or actually that was my answer.

"Look I'm not going anywhere unless you're" Edward knew how stubborn I was so didn't argue. "Let's go check on my father and then we're both going to my place," he said as he took hold of my hand. To people who didn't know we would look like a couple, but in reality we were two friends who supported each other very much.

Okay, I might have a crush on him but that didn't change anything. I would be there for him anyway. Carlise still had not woken up but his condition was way better then Esme's. He had a concussion and a couple of broken ribs, but all in all he would be fine in a couple of weeks.

"Hi guys, we brought you some coffee" a voice said and as I looked at her I was immediatly thrown away by her beauty, this was definitly Rosalie and the guy next to her must be Jasper then. My thoughts were confirmed when Edward introduced me to them.

"It's nice to meet you guys," I said with a smile "Same here" they both answered. "So Edward, are you finally going to tell what you decided or do I have to kidnap Bellie and get it out of you like that?" Emmet asked half teasing, half serious or so I hoped.

Edward explained to them what we had come up with and of course Edward being Edward made it look like I was a genius. "Thank you so much Bella, you saved our mothers life" Alice sounded so gratefull, it kind of scared me because what if went wrong, hopefully not.

"Let's first see how the operation goes Alice and then you can thank me" I told her that because I would feel guilty if things did go wrong. "That Max is really an idiot, I mean Bella comes from Iran and has like travelled for so long but can fix this and that idiot is sitting there for ages coming up with the hardest operations," Rosalie said and scoffed.

"It's still a hard operation Rose, but if something goes wrong we will be able to be there faster than if we do stitch it up," Edward explained. "So Bella, how is it in Iran with this douche bag?" Jasper teased which caused every one to smile at least a bit.

We told them our stories and laughed about the crazy stuff we had done during our time there. It felt good to have something else to talk about because it pushed the thoughts of a hurt Esme and Carlise aside, at least for a bit.

Before we left Max came and told us that the decision had been made and that they were going to make use of my idea. They reassured us that they would call if there was a problem. Edward also sent Alice and Emmet home because they were tired as hell too.

So that's how I got to Edward's beautiful loft. It's was nicely decorated but all those things didn't really represent Edward. It was nice and beautiful but it was not Edward, "My sister and mom decorated it, except my room. That was left for me" he murmered and then took my bags.

"Come on" he said as he walked to the room in the back. He opened the door and I gasped when I saw that his room was totally different that the rest of the decorating. The walls were painted black but his closet was broken white and his grand bed too. He had lots of CD's and books, some of his where next to his bed.

There was a beautiful painting in the corner of his room. It was a girl who had her back turned to the world and was standing on a cliff but she was holding her hand out, she wanted someone to take it because she didn't want to jump.

"The painting...it's beautiful" I breathed out. Edward opened his mouth to say something but then decided to leave it for himself. "What is it?" I was dying to know what he was thinking. "The painting it...it makes me think of you" he whispered as he looked away. I put my hand on his cheek so he would look at me.

"Tell me what you think" I murmered. "When I used to look at the girl I saw my future, because I always wanted to be the person she was holding her hand out to and now when I look at it I see you because I want you to hold your hand out to me" his honesty and sincerity was so obivious in his voice.

"I want to be that girl" I didn't know what we were telling each other, was this a confession or not? Edward looked intensly at me and then kissed my cheek and then the other, and then my forehead, my eyelids. I was dying to feel his lips on mine, because every place he kissed felt like it was on fire. I wanted to feel that on my lips.

But he didn't, he didn't kiss my lips, instead he took my hand and led me inside. "Where are we going?" I asked but was met by silence. He entered a room a beautiful room that was painted white and had only two objects in it, a grand black piano and a black cleopatra sofa which was golden on the sides.

He leaded me to the sofa and made me sit on it. He gave me another kiss on the forehead and then walked to his piano.

Without saying a word Edward started playing something. It gave me feelings that I had felt before, like the first time we had met and then it changed to painfully, to the moment the first attack had happened, and then it turned soft to the moment we comforted each other. Then it was beautiful again, like the times we had in Iran and then suddenly it hardened, it was painfull and so hard to listen to.

This was about his parents, about the pain he felt when he heard of the crash, it stayed like this and then he suddenly changed it to the now. The sudden change was his shock and the soft tone was us being together and supporting each other. I felt what he felt.

It ended softly, because that was how things would be. No hard things for us anymore, wouldn't it just be perfect?

"I've had that on my mind since the day I met you and it just wouldn't end, so before I exploded I had to play" he explained with his back still turned to me.

I was crying... of course I was. He had just played our life and again to anyone outside it would have looked oh so stupid, but this was us, this was our reality, our life.

I walked to him and sat next to him on the bench. I putted my head on his shoulder as he started playing something else, something softer. I hadn't realised that I had fallen asleep until he caried me to the room.

"You're going to break your back" I murmered sleepily as I putted my arms around his neck. "You're like the bag I wore to school," he answered, "Wow, you must have had a very heavy bag then," I said sarcastically. He chuckled but didn't answer me. When we walked in to his room he putted me down and looked at me intently.

"You should sleep," he whispered. I didn't want to change my clothes, I was too tired so I just went to sit on his bed.

He was about to leave when I stopped him "Edward, sleep with me?" I asked as I held my hand out so he could take it. He looked at it for a moment and then nodded. He took my hand and slid in next to me.

It put my head on his chest and he wrapped his arm around, his other hand was still wrapped around mine. This was home, he was my home.

Suddenly everything was clear to me, it was not the house, it had never been the house, it was him. When I was with him I was home, not in our place at Iran, not in his house in Portland but with him.

I smiled and closed my eyes letting the sleep take us over.

I woke up to the sound of a ringing phone. It was Edwards. I took his phona and saw that it was Max and since I was 100 percent sure that Edward would want to talk to him I, I woke him up.

He looked confused at first "It's Max" I said as he nodded. He took the phone and answered it "Yes? What? Is she okay?" he said panicked "Oh okay. Sure, we'll be there by then" he sounded reliefed when he said that.

After ending his phone call I waited for Edward to say something but instead of saying something he did something, he took me in his arms and hugged me tightly "Thank you so much Bella, if it wasn't for you we wouldn't have come up with this idea" he breathed in and planted a kiss on my forehead.

"Edward I'm sure you would have come up with it eventually" I said and he scoffed "I wasn't thinking clearly Bella, and Max? Well I don't know about him" he said with a frown.

"So she is okay?" I asked and changed the subject because I was actually more intrested in that part "Yes she is, thanks to you. In exactly two hours she will wake up, or that is what Max says anyway," by the way he was talking I got the idea that he wasn't fond of Max.

"He's a good guy you know, just give him a chance," I murmered "Yeah sure" he said dismissing the subject, but I got the feeling that Edward wouldn't actually give him that chance.

My stomach growled and snapped us out of our silly bubble "Time to feed my favorite doctor," he said with a grin, "When did I become your favorite doctor?" I asked surprised. "The moment you decided to sleep with me" he teased and made me blush. I didn't show him that I was blushing and pushed him away. "In your dreams doctor Cullen," I yelled as I walked in to the bathroom, "Every night" he yelled back and then laughed loudly.

I bet he would run away when I told him what my dream were about. It was always him in a beautiful position and very naked "Oh god Bella, do you really have to think about that when he is a couple feet away?" I asked myself as I looked in the mirror. "You know what they say about people who talk to their own!" He teasingly yelled. "They're not crazy as long as they don't get an aswer!" I argued back.

"Whatever you say, angel" he said with a chuckle and I blushed at the name he chose for me. Thank god he didn't saw that.

I went in to the shower and took a nice hot shower. Stupid thought suddenly entered my mind.

What if Edward didn't see me like that and would find a girl who he would fall in love with and then leave me to marry her, because after all I'm just a friend, right? Ughh, I hated to have these kind of thougts because they always made me feel insecure.

And if there is one thing I hate, it is insecurity! I let the hot water push these stupid thoughts aside. Suddenly words to a song entered my mind. They just came to me and I started singing it

_"Can I take you away from the demons that we call a live?_

_Can I take you away and put you in a box that I carry around?_

_Can I take you away, into the light away from the dark?_

_Can I take you away...Can I take you away..._

_Can I take you away and hide you from the evil that is our world"_

I don't know how the song came up, after all I'm not a songwriter but it felt like it was meant for someone and that someone was Edward. It scared me because I was really afraid of falling in love.

But with Edward it felt like I could take the world, but all I wanted was him. I was digging a hole and if Edwards feeling for me werent mutual I think I would burry myself in that hole.

All I wanted to do was take him and safe him from the world, from reality but would he let me?

After I dressed myself I went inside and was met by the beautiful sight of the most gorgeous man on the whole world.

He was already dressed but he must have been tired because he was lying on the bed with his eyes closed.

"Please take me away," he whispered and I gasped.

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><p>There you go folks, please leave me a review because they are better than a singing Bella in the shower ;)<p> 


	6. Chapter 6

There you go folks, I hope you like it. I know I took my time with posting it but school has started again so I will only be able to post once a week, I hope you don't mind :D

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><p>Edward and I went to the hospital and were immediatly greeted by the chief "Doctor Swan I must congratulate you, you came up with a very good idea that my doctors couldn't come up with."<p>

"Thank you sir, I'm glad I could help," I answered with a smile. "So chief, how are my parents?" Edward hesitated a bit, the chief smiled at him "Edward they are both fine, and they will be even better in a couple weeks, even though Carlise already wants to start working" he chuckled.

"That's typical dad behaviour," Edward said as he rolled his eyes. The chief said he had some work to do and then left, and that left me and Edward "You ready to meet my parents?" he asked.

I nodded with a smile because I was scared that if I said something he would notice how nervous I was. After all I was going to meet his parents and I had to do everything to not thank them for giving birth to there extremely hot and sexy son, who was now looking strangely.

"What are you thinking?" he asked curiously "Nothing" I answered quikly. "Bella you're as red as a tomato, so tell me what's going in that naughty head of yours" and naughty it was indeed! "I was thinking about the first time I started working in the hospital" I quikly covered myself.

"And that makes you blush?" he asked incrudiosly "No not that but the fact that I fell down flat on my face in front of my chief. That was pretty disturbing" I grimaced as I remembered the memory.

"I'm pretty sure that happened" he chuckled and I glared at him "But i"m not sure if that is what you really were thinking" he said with a cocky grin. I snapped "What, you think I was thinking about how sexy and hot you're and that I should thank you're parents for giving birth to you?" I sarcasctically said even though it was real.

I didn't notice that Edward had stopped walked until I wanted to look at his face to gaug his reaction. He was standing a couple feet away from me with a surprised look on his face "You think I'm hot and sexy?" he asked shock clear in his voice.

"I say a whole sentence and of course that is the only thing he catches," I muttered as he smirked.

"Let's just go" I sighed and then walked to his parents room. Edward followed me, the whole time smirking.

When we entered the room both Esme and Carlisle were awake. They were talking to each other and when we came in they looked at us with a genuine smile. Edward walked to his mother's side "Mom, you really scared us" he said as he kissed her cheek. "I'm okay honey, I still have a lot to do so I won't be going anywhere in the near future," she said and then winked at Carlisle.

I thought it was sweet and Edward looked like he wanted to puke "Okay mom, TMI. Anyway I want you to meet Isabella Swan" A look of shock crossed her face "You're Isabella?"

"Yes but please call me Bella, Isabelle makes me feel old" I smiled at her. "You saved my life. I owe you my life" she said so sincerly. "Oh no please, I'm really happy that I was able to do something, and seeing you like this is already enough for me," i answered genuinly.

"Well thank you Bella and Edward she's a keeper. Got it?" she said sternly to him as I blushed. "Oh yeah about that, mom dad Bella would like to thank you guys for giving birth to your sexy and hot son" That damn smirk just didn't leave his face.

"Oh thank you Bellie, I'm also very thankfull that they gave me birth" Emmet teased as he entered the room with his wife, Rose.

"She wasn't talking about you Em" Edward frowned. "Oh come on Edward, scared of a bit of competition?" now Emmet was also smirking.

"I should wish you goodluck with these sons Mrs Cullen" I teased. "And me!" Rose said sternly but with a smile. "Well then we should wish you goodluck too Bella. I'm sure he's making you crazy in Iran and please just call us Carlisle and Esme, the Mrs and Mr makes us look old" Carlisle said with a wink.

"I don't know about you honey, but I'm definitly not old! Oh and Belle if he does make you crazy, just give me a call and I will take care of it" Esme added with a smile.

Edward and Emmet were still bickering about who was hot and sexy. I looked at Edward and sighed contently "He's actually taking great care of me Esme. I must be very lucky"

"Come on Bella tell him, I'm the hot and sexy one right?" Edward asked me totally obvlious of my talk with Esme. "If there is someone hot and sexy then it's definitly me. I'm a doctor, I have the looks and I have a beautiful wife who makes me even look better," was smirking in the family or something because yeah Carlisle followed too.

"Yes I go for Carlisle!" Rose grinned at Esme, "Totally Carlisle" I joked as Edward glared at me. "I'm with you girls," Esme said and winked at Carlisle. "Ugh mom, stop with the winking" Edward whined. We all laughed out loud at that.

"Mommy!" We didn't hear Alice and Jasper enter but we definitly heared her chirping voice when she yelled for her mother. She jumped on her bed and hugged her tightly "Easy Alice, she was just operated" Edward said concerned.

"I'm okay son" Esme said as she hugged Alice. "And I thought she was a daddy's girl" Carlise frowned.

"I love you too daddy!" She yelled with a smile. I looked at everyone and it actually was a moment to put on picture. They all looked so happy and content, it brought a large smile on my face.

"What are you thinking about?" Edward whispered in my ear. I turned to look at him and this time I smirked "Wouldn't you like to know?". I walked to Rose, Jasper and Emmet and left Edward there who looked like he was in deep thought.

Later that afternoon I decided to call my own parents because I had really missed them and seeing Edward and his parents like that made me miss them even more. Of course the whole phone call turned into something emotional with lots of tears coming from me and Renee and even a few from Charlie.

What surprised me the most was that they wanted to see me very and decided to come to Seattle and spend some time with them. I told them that I was in Port Angeles and that I would go to Seatlle later on. She told me to send a message when I decided to go Seattle.

Emmet and Rose were giving a dinner at their place, so after the visiting hour, we as in me, Edward, Jasper and Alice to their. Of course each couple in their own car. "I called my parents" I told Edward softly.

"So that's the reason you had been crying. You really scared me for a moment," he said because when he asked me why I was crying I told him that we would talk about it later. Edward being Edward was worried.

"I'm meeting them in Seattle. We have a lot to talk about," I said as I looked out of the window.

He took my hand and gave it a squeeze. "Bella that is really great. You should definitly talk to them, let them explain how they really feel about you"

"Until recently I really thought they just saw me as a mistake," I confessed as tears sprung to my eyes. "Bella, no one can see you as a mistake. In fact I think you're a gift to all of us, especially me" he smiled softly at me.

I choked back the tears "I hate you" I mumbled "What?" he said shocked "I thought I was done with the crying but no there goes mister again and says something beautiful which makes me cry all over again" I confessed. He laughed loudly at that "Oh Bella, you really are something else, aren't you?"

We pulled up to Emmet and Rosalie's house and went inside. Me, Alice and Rose went to the kitchen to prepare some food while the guys were in the living room catching up with Edward.

After trying to make a choice on what the cook Alice came up with the idea of just ordering something so we could have some girl time. We asked the boys what they wanted and then ordered the food.

Alice poured us all a glass of Chardonay and then we all went to sit. They started asking me questions about Iran, about Edward, about Edward and I which I didn't understand at first.

"Guys I don't know what you're talking about. Edward and I... we are just good friends" I told them honestly. Of course that didn't mean that I didn't wish that Edward and I were more than that but still. "Maybe they are just friends with benefits," Rose said to Alice.

"No there is more than that Rose, you can see it in their faces and their body language" Alice answered acting like I wasn't there at all. "Yeah but she's glowing like all the time, maybe they just have very good sex?" Rose thought loudly. I decided that this was a conversation I didn't need to hear and slipped out of the kitchen without them noticing.

I walked to the livingroom and was about to turn the corner when I heard my name "You're really lucky to have her Edward" I recognized Jaspers voice. "Yeah I'm, she really keeps my feet on the ground" Edward answered and I could hear the smile in his voice.

"I bet she's spanking you too!" Emmet laughed loudly but his laughter was cut shortly so I think either Edward or Jasper had hit him in the head, or maybe both. "You didn't need to hit me you know," my thoughts were confirmed when Emmet muttered that.

I decided that I didn't want to hear more of that either and started walking inside when the doorbell rang. I walked to the door and payed the guy who brought our food before anyone could get there. Right when the guy was counting the money Edward came "Hey what are you doing?" he immediatly asked.

"Here take the food, I'm coming" I said as I handed him the food. The guy who was counting the money was really starting to irritate me because he was really slow. "You know what just keep the change" I said and a big smile formed on his face. Idiot. I closed the door and looked at Edward who now had a scowl on his face.

"You're so taking my money" he said "Yeah sure hun" I answered sarcastically because honestly I didn't need the money. "Oh come on Bella, that's not fair. I was supposed to pay for the food and you already did so much for us" he rambled. "You know what just buy me dinner or something and then we'll be even, okay?" I sighed.

He smirked at me which made me wonder what he was thinking. I looked at him with narrowed eyes "Okay, a date it is" he enthusiastically said. "Did I really just asked him on a date?" I didn't mean to say that out loud but sometimes my brain and mouth aren't on the same page. "You sure did hun" he was still smirking.

"Edward-" I started but was cut of by Emmets loud voice "Get on it later, I'm hungry!" I blushed furiously at his comment and walked to the kitchen to let the girls now that our food had arrived. "Bella are you blushing?" the-so-observant-Alice asked.

"Uhm no, it's just very cold outside you know" I tried but yeah me being me couldn't really tell a lie without stuttering "Oh really? And why might I ask were you outside?" smart girl.

"Well...the food has arrived and the deliverer took a long time with counting the money" hey I wasn't totaly lying. "Uhu" Alice said which led me to believe that she didn't believe me. "Okay then, anyway the food has arrived so let's go eat" Rose said and stood up. She and Emmet were sometimes so alike. I smiled at the thought.

All together we had a nice dinner and chat. They didn't saw me as an outsider and made me feel comfortable. It was like they were my family, you know.

Edward and I said goodbye to them and then went home in his car. On the way home Edward and I decided to buy some alcohol so we could get drunk, and not just wine but strong and good alcohol.

We bought a bottle of black vodka, Martini and a good bottle of Whiskey. We would decide later which we would drink.

At home we first changed into some comfortable clothes, which meant shorts and a tank top for me and sweatpants and a shirt for Edward. He looked hot even in sweatpants!

We decided to start with the Martini. Of course our plan was to keep it at one bottle but when the Martini was finished we decided to drink the vodka because we wanted more!

Yeah, we were definitly getting tipsy. "Edward?" I asked innocently. "Uhu?" he looked at me with a frown. "Nothing" I shook my head but after a minute I did it again. "Edward?" "Yes Bella?" he answered patiently.

"Nothing" this time I freaking giggled. After some silence I did it again "Edward?" "Just spit it out Swan" he demanded. This demanding Edward suddenly made me all hot and bothered. "I think you're hot but I also think that you should take off your shirt" I blurted out.

He looked strangely at me and then stood up. He never took his eyes away from me and that made everything so much better. When he took his shirt of I thought I was going to pass away. I sighed contently. "You're so beautiful" I said as I took his perfection in.

"Next to you I'm nothing" he said and went to sit again but this time closer to me. "Pheww, it's a bt hot in here don't you think?" I looked away from him because otherwise I was going to lose it and attack him. "I think you're hot" he quoted me.

"I want some more vodka!" I shoved my glass in his face to create some distance. There was only a bit vodka left in the bottle. "Hmm, I think we have to share doctor Swan. Open your mouth" he ordered.

I nervously nodded because I was going to loose it any moment. But suddenly that thought wasn't so bad anymore. I opened my mouth all the while keeping my eyes on his. Edward took the bottle and placed it at my mouth. I started drinking of it but when I felt Edwards hand on my thigh I choked.

"Let's not waste the last vodka we have sweetheart" he seductively said and I softly nodded.

This time he placed the bottle to his mouth and I watched him drink heavily out of it. I had enough of it. I pulled the bottle out of his hand and threw it somewhere. Without giving Edward the chance of asking me what I was doing I put my lips on his and kissed him fiercly.

Edward was surprised at first but then he responded, and he responded damn well! His hands were roaming all over my body as my tongue entered his mouth. Our tongues were battling and our hands were roaming but we wanted more! Edward stood up and was about to pull away when I put my legs around his waist and my hands on his shoulder to keep myself up.

He looked devilishly at me and then started kissing me and walking to his or my bedroom at the same time. Edward suddenly pushed me to a door or a wall, i'm not sure, but it made me hiss at the contact. "I've wanted to this since the moment I met you" he groaned while I sucked at his neck which made him growl. Yes ladies and gentlemen I made him growl!

"Lets take this to the bedroom" I panted. He nodded and started walking again without breaking our skin to skin contact. When he walked upon the stairs we almost fell, which made me giggle and him groan. After making sure I was okay, he started walking upstairs.

We then entered a room, finally! Edward put me gently on the bed and then hovered over me "I'm yours Edward" I said breathless. This time he kissed my lips softly but then he suddenly pulled back. "We need protection. Wait here" he said and then dissepeared out of the room.

And then suddenly everything was black.

I woke up with the urge of throwing up and that was not the only thing, my head was spinning and it was like people were hitting my head with a hammer. When the urge of throwing up got stronger I ran to the toilet and threw up every single thing I had in my stomach.

After that I felt slightly better but my head was still throbbing. I tried to think what could have caused and then remembered that Edward and I had bought some alcohol but I couldn't really remember what happened.

There was one thing that I remembered and that was a very naughty dream of me and Edward but that was all.

Speaking of Edward "Where could he be?" I asked loudly. I walked in to my room and screamed when I saw him in my bed. Shirtless I might add!

He woke up to my screaming and hissed "Oh god, please make it go away" he mumbled.

Edward then looked at my face and bolted up. "Bella?"

"Yes Edward?" I asked nervously because at the moment I didn't know what to think. "Uhmm did we...uhmm...well we...did we drink alot?" he decided to ask but I was sure that he wanted to ask something else, the same thing I wanted to ask.

"Yeah duhh, why would we otherwise be hungover?" I answered sarcastically. "Of course you're right. That explains the headache but why am I here, shirtless I might add" he asked confused.

I decided that if I did had sex with him that I firstly would be naked and secondly I don't think I would forget something like that! "You must have fallen asleep Edward, it's not the first time we've slept together Edward" I said but then regretted it because of the double meaning.

He smirked at me "Ughh you know what I mean" I said and walked back to the bathroom to take a shower. I heard him leaving probably to take a shower too.

Too bad my dream was a dream because honestly if my dream would have been real then I don't think I would ever stop Edward Cullen, the man of my dreams.

Edward and I didn't talk much in the morning because of our headache. We had a silent breakfast and then went to the hospital to see his parents.

"You two look amazing!" Emmet sarcastically said, loudly! "Ugh stop yelling" i cursed.

"Honey he's not yelling, believe me I know when he's yelling" Rose said with a wink. "Ieuw Rose, TMI, really" i said disgusted. She laughed it off.

"Here take some advil, you guys look hungover" Alice said and handed us a glass of water and the advil. Edward and I looked at eachother as it downed on us that we were total idiots. "We are so stupid" we both said at the same time.

"And we call ourself doctors" Edward muttered, and he was right. I mean which idiot -apart from us- doesn't take advil when he's hungover.

We were absolutely meant for each other!

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><p>Voila, hope you liked it. Show me some love and push that review button! ;)<p> 


	7. Chapter 7

Hey guys, I know it's been a time since I posted a new chapter but I'm having a really hard time at the moment. My grandfather died and my mom has a tumor. I'm trying to deal with it but writing is not so easy for me at the moment, I can't really concentrate but I did finish this chapter so here you got a little something something. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'm going to try to post the next chapter a.s.a.p.

Enjoy

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><p>"So, you ready for our date today?" Edward asked as I made us some coffee.<p>

Yesterday we had brought his parents home, they were feeling a lot better which made us all happy. Edward and I decided that I would leave to Seattle after our date so I could spend some time with him. Which brings us to our date.

Edward didn't even say a single word about it except that I should wear something casual and that we would walk a lot, so I had to wear some good shoes.

"Yeah, but you still don't want to give me a hint on where we are going?" I tried for the millionth time. "Woman, how many times are you going to ask that? And no by the way" he said with a shake of his head. I pouted at him because I knew that he couldn't really resist that.

I was wrong "Don't pull the pout on me Doctor Swan, I'm going to get ready for our day and when I'm back I want you all ready for our date" he said sternly.

"Such a bossy man" I muttered. He chuckled and left the room. I still couldn't believe it actually, I was going on a date with him. Would we kiss at the end of our date or not? "Ugh" I was so frustrated.

My thoughts were suddenly distracted by my cell, my mother was calling. "Hello mom" I answered with a smile. "Hi honey, how are you?" she asked "I'm fine, you?" "Me too. So everything is okay for tomorrow?" she asked worried.

"Yes mom, don't worry. Tomorrow around noon I will be in your arms" I told her happily. I heard her sniffle "Oh mom you're not crying again aren't you?" "I'm sorry sweetheart, but I just can't believe that I'm seeing you after so long. I have really missed you and so has your father"

"I have missed you guys too, a lot you know but I'm not crying because I know that tomorrow will come sooner than you think mommy" Okay to be honest I was actually holding back on the tears.

"You're right. Okay so be careful on your way here and drive safely" she warned me. "No worries mom, I'll be fine" I assured her. After saying goodbye we both hung up.

I didn't hear Edward come in so when he sighed I gasped. "I'm going to miss you" he pouted.

"I won't be gone long Edward, just some quality time with my parents" I said as I went to stand in front of him. He caressed my cheeks and I really had to hold myself back because I suddenly had to urge to kiss the hell out of him.

"Yes but still, I find it very strange to be without you. Is that weird?" he asked no humor in his voice. "No It's not and I find that too but today it is our day, okay mister?" I said with a grin.

He smiled and nodded "Yes ma'am it's our day, only you and me" he made me feel all warm and giddy inside by only saying that.

After cleaning our plates and cups we got in his car and left. "So where are we going?" I asked. He sighed and looked at me "So noisy" he teased "All I'm telling you is we are going to my favorite place in Washington" he told me and I could see in his eyes that wherever he was taking me was a place that was very important to him.

So I nodded and kept quiet for some time, and listened to some music. But in reality all I could think of was me and Edward kissing, making out, anything. I just wanted to feel him. I couldn't hold on any longer, I wanted him and I needed him.

When Edward pulled of the highway I demanded him to stop the car "Edward stop the car now" I think I also was a bit breathless.

"Bella what's going on?" he asked worried, the same time he pulled over. "It's just I need to tell you something and it can't wait" I said and stepped out of the car. He probably thought I had gone crazy or something, hell even I started thinking that.

Oh my god what am I doing, I can't just kiss him. Shit, what had I done, how was I going to explain him this.

I didn't even notice him stepping out of the car and coming to stand in front of me. Edward put both of his hands on my face and looked me straight in the eye. "Bella you're scaring me, are you okay?"

"Ah screw the world" I muttered and didn't give him time to respond because I put my lips on his and kissed him fiercely. He was shocked and surprised at first, so I pulled back.

"So how do you feel about women who take the first step?" I asked breathlessly "I think they're amazing but what do you think about men who take the second step?" he answered after a while but didn't give me the time to answer because this time he was the one who kissed me.

I smiled against his lips and kissed him back with all my eagerness. After some kissing he pulled back and looked at me with a confused expression. "Bella?" he asked but I put a finger up asking for some time so I could catch my breath.

"Okay, here goes nothing" I muttered "Edward I like you and at first I thought I could keep a distance because we're partners and we shouldn't be together and all but then I started hanging around with you. Hell, we almost became best friends and the only thing I could do was imagine how it would be to kiss you. There were times that I just wanted to ravish you, you know but then I couldn't because you know we're partners but today in the car I just couldn't hold back I had to do it. But if you think we shouldn't do this, I could totally understand that because we're partners you know?" I rambled on and on.

"Finished?" he asked with raised eyebrows. I nodded "Great. Bella I really like you and now just let me kiss you" he told me and before I could ask if he really meant that his lips were on mine again.

Heaven, it was pure heaven. I put my arms around his neck as he pulled me to him, tighter than before. I just couldn't get enough so when he slipped his tongue into my mouth I moaned.

His grip on me got even tighter, and instead of pain I felt pleasure. I put my hands in his hair and pulled him to me because I wanted him closer, as close as possible. He pulled breathlessly back but didn't let go of me.

"Why did we wait so long?" he panted "I don't know, but I think we should really enjoy our first kiss" I answered and got this funny look.

"Actually this is our second kiss" he said sheepishly and I looked at him like he had grown three heads "Please explain further because you lost me at the first kiss"

"The night we were drunk we kissed for the first time" he told me "In Iran?" I asked because we had also gotten drunk in Iran. "No not in Iran, here in Port Angeles, a couple days ago" he admitted and I gasped.

"But I thought that was a dream. Oh my god, the falling of the steps and the giggling… lots of giggling, they were real?" I asked embarrassed. He nodded with a grin "Oh my god, that is really embarrassing" I said as I covered my face with my hands.

He took them away "No, I rather think of it as a very hot first kiss" there was the famous Cullen smirk again. "It annoys me that I didn't remember it and why didn't you say anything?"

"Firstly I thought you regretted it but then it dawned on me that you didn't even remember it and at the time I thought that that was maybe better for us" the idiot explained, yes the idiot! If he had told me maybe thing would have been different, better.

"Have I ever told you that you're an idiot?" I asked him with a frown "No you haven't but I say it to myself all the time" he said as he pecked my lips.

"I forgive you" I said dazzled by his lips. "I forgive you too" he said and I pulled back in surprise "Why?" "Because I want to forgive you" he said with a smile "Not that idiot" I said as I slapped his chest "Why should I be forgiven?"

"Because you took so long to kiss me again" he explained with a smug look "Oh well, what about you mister?" I asked as I teasingly pulled away "I already told you that I am an idiot so don't count on me" he grinned and pulled me back to him.

I caressed his cheeks and smiled at him "You're my idiot" I said and kissed him. We stood there for a while, kissing each other and enjoying the moment. "We should go," Edward murmured against my lips "we still have a date." "Yes and people on the road are enjoying this too much" I said and looked pointedly at a man who was driving slower than he was supposed to.

Edward laughed at the man and then looked at me "Looks like he doesn't have what I have" "No one will have what you have, you're way too dumb" I joked. "Get in the car woman before I make you regret those words" he growled.

I just laughed at him and soon he joined me too. Edward opened my door for me, closed it when I took seat in the car and then went to sit in his place. "You may be dumb, but you're an absolute gentlemen"

"That's how I was raised, my mother would kill me if it would have been the other way. But she's right tough, the most important thing in the world is respect, especially to the ones you love and caress" he said as my heart made a jump. He may not have realized it but that was actually the first time he said that he actually loved me.

But I let it slip because I knew that when he was ready to tell me in the face, he would. We enjoyed the rest of our ride, holding hands, glancing at each other but most importantly we enjoyed each other's presence.

When we passed a board that said 'Forks' I glanced at him with a curious look. "Are we in Forks?" I asked him "Yes we are in Forks. Ever heard of it?" he asked me.

"No, this is the first time" I said as I shook my head. "Great, then you will enjoy it even more" he grinned. "Enjoy what exactly?" I asked him. "Today Bella, I'm going to show you my life. Forks is my most favorite place in Washington. I want you to see the places that mean a lot to me" He told me softly.

"Wow Edward, I… I don't know what to say" I was speechless. This was definitely going to be the best date ever. How did I know? Firstly I was with Edward and secondly he was trying too hard by doing something fancy, but he was showing me something that was special to him.

The more I saw of the town, the more I started to like it. The houses were beautiful and there were so many trees. It looked beautiful.

"Okay so the first place we are going to visit is a place that were I used to spend a lot of time before I went to Iran. When I needed to think, or get my head together I would drive for hours just to go to this place so I could think rationally." He told me and I felt as if I was starting to get to know a new Edward.

"I'm really curious" is all I could bring out. He smiled and caressed my cheek. He turned to left and drove right into the woods.

"We are almost there. I hope you don't mind walking a bit or do you want me to carry you?" he asked with a smirk. I narrowed my eyes as I answered his question "I'll be fine with both of my feet on the ground". All I got out of him was a chuckle.

He stopped in front of a path and shut the engine off, after that he walked out of the car and before I got the chance to open my door Edward was already there holding it open for me.

"Thank you" I said with a blush and took his hand which he was offering to me now. He planted a slight kiss on it and then helped me out the car.

We started walking in silence, still holding hands and I really wondered of this just was a dream. What if I actually didn't got the courage to kiss him and tell him that I liked him. Those thoughts were driving me crazy and Edward noticed it.

"What are you thinking about, beautiful?" he asked with a frown of his own "Nothing" I mumbled and looked away "It's stupid.." "You can tell me anything Bella" he told me and pulled me close to him.

"This isn't a dream, is it?" I asked him nervously and I was expecting this serious answer when he started laughing, hard. "What?" I frowned "That is what you're worrying your pretty little head about?" he said still laughing.

Was it possible that it was a dream? Yes, but it was also possible that this was real. "This is real because even dreams aren't this beautiful" he whispered and then planted his oh so loveable lips on mine. I loved having those lips on mine, I wished they would never leave mine.

"This is real, okay?" he asked softly and I nodded because I was still under the impact of his kiss. "This is real" I confirmed.

He smiled and pulled away, but he did take my hand and again started walking. Suddenly I saw this light in the distance, it was the reflecting of the sun. It looked beautiful and inviting. "Is that where we are going to?" I asked as I pointed to the place in the distance.

"Yes, it's a meadow. Probably the most beautiful place in the world" he answered and got me even more curious. All I wanted to do or actually say at that moment was 'I love you', but I knew it was too early for that. We weren't ready for that yet.

When we got closer the meadow started becoming clear for me and when I planted my feet for the first time on the meadow and really looked around I gasped. "This place is…" I couldn't think of a word to describe this place. "Heaven" Edward completed with a smile.

He pulled me to the middle of the meadow and then placed us both on the ground. His eyes were closed and never before had I seen him so peaceful, like he had no care in the world. I caressed his face with my hands and sighed in delight "You're so beautiful" I murmured.

Without opening his eyes he pulled me on his lap "Kiss me Bella" he breathed out. I didn't give it a second thought and planted my lips on his, wishing I didn't ever have to leave them.

His hands tightened on my waist and pulled me even closer "Edward" I moaned. That was all that he needed to hear to turn us around so now I was laying on the ground and he was hovering over me "Bella I…" he started and for a moment I thought he was going to say that he loved me "I wonder if I will ever get enough of this" he finished, and even though I felt sad that he didn't tell me I knew I was his and that that time will also come.

"That doesn't matter Edward because I'm yours, you can have all of me" I answered breathlessly. The only answer he gave was a kiss that sent me to heaven, literally.

I put my hands under his shirt and heard him groan when I caressed his upper body with my hands. "Can you take this of?" I asked him with a blush and pulled back. "I can…but I won't" he answered and made me feel rejected.

"I want you to take it of Bella" he said as he planted another soft kiss on my lips. I did what he said and took his shirt of. For a minute I just took him in and sighed contently "I really love your body. You're just perfect" I said and placed my hands on his shoulder.

"I am nothing compared to you" he whispered in my ear. I didn't answer him because I knew it would lead to a discussion so to silence him I kissed him. My hands were all over his upper body, enjoying the feeling of him. "We got to stop this now or I won't be able to stop if we continue" he groaned.

"You're right" I said but didn't stop kissing him. In one move I was back in his lap and slightly disorientated "We have some other places to visit" he told me as he put his shirt back on.

"I liked you without the shirt" I murmured and looked down "I like you with nothing on" he whispered in my ear and chuckled when I gasped. "How would you even know?" I joked

"I like to take a sneak peek when you take a shower" he answered and stood up leaving me in shock.

Edward started walking back to the car "Come on what are you waiting you for?" he asked with a smile when he saw that I wasn't moving. I decided to take the upper hand and said "Nothing, I was just thinking about the day that you were moaning my name while taking a shower" and then he was the one in shock.

Our next stop was a house "What is this place?" I asked him as we stepped out of his car. "This my sweetheart is my dream house" he told me as he took my hand. "What?" I asked him with a funny look. "This is the house where I want to live in the future…with my family" the last part was so soft that I almost didn't hear it.

The house? It was beautiful and special just like him. At the front there were flowers everywhere and it maybe cliché but yes there was also a white fence. The house was pretty big and looked lovely from the outside. It was a white house with big windows that gave you a clear vision of the inside but from the inside also the outside.

Images of me and Edward living here with our children surrounded me. "It's beautiful" I said mesmerized "Yes it is" he said in a complete daze. "So do you know the owner?" I asked him curiously so we could maybe go inside.

"Yes and the owner would like to know if you would want to spend the night here" he asked with a smile and pulled me to him. "Well that's very sweet of them" I murmured. Edward started laughing at my response.

"Beautiful it's my house" he chuckled and I blushed because I felt like an absolute idiot. "Of course it is" I muttered and hid my face with my hands. "Come on let's go, we have a whole afternoon, evening and night just for the two of us." I nodded and walked to the door with him.

"Thanks for letting me in" I said and kissed him softly. Today Edward had shown me what he really wanted and what really was important for him. I loved him even more for that. "Thank you for giving me the chance" he told me and then opened the door.

When I looked around in the house I could see Edward everywhere. The paintings, the furniture, the colors, it all represented them. "Come on the living room is this way" he said and pulled me to another room. Suddenly Edward stopped dead in his tracks and if I wasn't holding on to him I would be saying hello to the floor. "What's wrong?" I asked and went to stand next to him. I got no answer so I followed his eyes and found them on the face of a girl who was lying on his couch.

"She is…uhm…Bella, that's Emily"


	8. Chapter 8

Hey guys,

First of all I'm so sorry for letting you wait for so long, but yeah I was going trough some bad stuff. I went to the village where my grandpa lived and buried him there with my family. I stayed there for a month with my grandma so I could support her, they were married for more than 50 years, so yeah it was pretty hard on her. Anyway, it was a small village and we didn't have internet at home so I couldn't post anything but I did write lots of chapter which I will be posting tonight. I'm going to finish this story soon, so guys we are nearing the end.

Before I stop rambling -yes I know and I'm sorry for that, but just give me a minute- I want thank Jess, A is for Angel, cullengirl08 for their sweet messages, really they meant so much to me. I'm not really good with words so I'm going to keep it at a thank you and a couple chapters. I hope you guys still like it and are continuing this journey with me.

I also got a lot of story alerts, that makes me very happy, believe me it does but you know what would make me even happier? A review.

Thanks guys, and here you. Hope you like it :)

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><p>"She is…uhm…Bella, that's Emily"<p>

I was confused for a moment, and wrong ideas came into my head. Maybe she was his wife and he wasn't supposed to be home, or maybe she was an ex-girlfriend, or just his girlfriend.

"Emily as in…?" I softly got out after a long pause.

"Emily is…uhm was…the girl, well uhm she was I think…" Edward couldn't get it out and that even scared me more. "Just tell me Edward" even I heard the fear in my voice while saying that. I had just gotten him and there was no way I would lose him, and I didn't believe that he was a cheater or something like that.

Edward turned to me and in a second it wasn't the girl who was laying on the couch that scared me but the hurt look on his face. "She was my best friend" he whispered in pain.

"Was?" it came out of my mouth before I could think. "She chose her boyfriend over me after a friendship that started when we were only two" he told me softly and the look in his eyes told me that this girl definitely meant a lot for him.

"Hey, it's okay. Or so it will be" that last part I muttered because even I couldn't be sure of the future, but I would do anything to keep him happy.

"Edward?" a soft call broke our conversation, and Edward immediately tensed.

We both turned to look at her, but what we saw confused me too. I felt bad for the girl, she looked like she had cried for hours and hours and all I wanted to do was go and make sure she was okay.

"Emily" he breathed out and then suddenly the look in his eyes changed from soft to cold. I hated it the instant I saw it.

"I, I didn't mean to be here and I didn't know you were here. I thought you were in Iraq or Iran. I just, I didn't have anywhere to go and I…I" and then suddenly she busted out in tears. Edward took a step forward but then stopped himself.

I sighed and then walked to the girl myself. There was a tissue box on the table so I took a tissue and gave it to here "Hey, are you ok?" I asked and went to sit next to her.

"Thank you," she answered as she took the tissue and then nodded "I am okay, I think I should go" the girl, Emily, said and stood up.

"You can't go anywhere in this condition Emily, sit down" Edward ordered and then sighed deeply. Then he looked like something dawned on him "Oh god, did Sam hurt you?" he looked so angry, and I guess Sam was Emily's boyfriend.

"Edward no! You know he wouldn't hurt me" she answered back in defense "at least physically" she added the last part in a whisper.

"What about I make some tea and you two talk a bit. You can tell your story" I said and pointed to Emily "and you can listen to her, and let her speak out" this time I pointed to Edward. They both nodded and I stood up to go to the kitchen, except I didn't know where the kitchen was.

"Uhm a little help here" I asked Edward. "Oh yeah sorry, come on it's this way. And you stay here, don't you dare to leave" the last part he said to Emily sounding a bit angry.

"I don't want to interfere but I think you should take it easy on her. She doesn't really look well and I think that she needs you. Badly" I said after he showed me the kitchen.

He looked at me and opened his mouth several times to say something, but not once did he get something out. I sighed "Start with Emily and then me" I told him because I knew he was struggling about what to say.

Edward sighed "It's just strange you know. She's the last person I expected here" "Oh so there are people that you do except?" I teased to lighten the mood.

He huffed and continued "Absolutely not, but I, I feel like I'm at a loss of words. I want to go inside and be mad at her but I can't because of our past." "And you shouldn't be Edward. She's human like us, and we all make mistakes. Not everyone forgives easily, and I am not telling you to forgive her in a snap, I'm just saying that you should give her a second chance. Let her tell her story and be there for her."

"You're amazing, you know that? And this, this is not fair to you. You deserve better than this, but instead we're in my house discussing my best friend" he said frustrated. But what I noticed was that he said best friend not ex-best friend, which made me grin at him.

"Why are you grinning?" Edward asked confused, probably thinking I had a problem with my head. "I think there still might be hope for you dr. Cullen" I said and gave a kiss on his cheek.

"That's all I get?" he asked with a pout as I pushed him out of the kitchen. "Yes…for now" I added the last part with a wink and saw his smile grow.

I turned around and was met by the beautiful sight of the kitchen of which I suddenly had to urge to cook, to make things for my Edward. I was picturing myself cooking a delicious meal while Edward was running after a giggling Edward junior. I felt a smile on my face and shook my head trying to erase those crazy thoughts. After all we had just gotten together you know?

I went through all his cabinets and guess what; no food, no drinks not even tea! And I was hungry so I decided to call and order take out. I took my phone and called the phone service to ask the number of a take-out and since we were in forks we had only two options; Chinese and pizza. I went with the Chinese because come on every one likes Chinese, right?

Edward and Emily had been talking for an hour when the doorbell rang. "I got it" I yelled and opened the door.

"Delivery for Cullen?" a young guy with blond hair and soft blue eyes asked "Yep, that's for me. Here you go" I said as I handed him the money. "Hey what's your name?" I asked him "Uhm…Thomas" he answered softly. I took a bill of twenty dollar and handed it to him "Well Thomas here you go, that's for you. Take your girl out for a drink." I said with a winked. Thomas blushed and thanked me.

I took the food and went inside. "Hey guys, sorry for cutting you of but I ordered us some food and I for one think we are definitely in need for food."

"Uhm thank you for the food but I think it's definitely better if I leave" Emily said and tried to smile but it was clear to me that she was not ok at all and definitely not in a state to leave. "You're not leaving missy, I ordered a lot of food that Edward and I can't finish on or own, right Edward?" Edward was silent the whole time and I couldn't read his face which worried me.

"She's right, you're staying" he replied softly. Emily stood up and walked to me "I'll go set the table" she said and took the food from me. I went to sit next to Edward and took his hand in mine. "You ok?" he asked me as he squeezed my hand "Edward I'm supposed to ask you that not the other way around, and for the record I'm fine" I said and gave his hand a squeeze back.

"I'm mad and confused but also ready to forgive her, she has been my best friend for so long but she hurt me very badly. She's actually one of the reason I chose to go to Iran" he explained to which my face fell. The more he told the more it looked like he had feelings for her.

I looked him right in the eye and asked him the one question that I feared the most "Edward are you in love with her?" I didn't know the question sounded like a joke to Edward because he started laughing. When he saw that I wasn't laughing with me he looked a bit taken back "Oh you're serious" he stated and I looked at him with a pointed look.

"Bella no, ugh I can't even imagine it" he shuddered and pulled a strange face. "Sorry I just…I don't know I thought that she had left you or something" I muttered embarrassed and looked away from him. "Emily is or was a friend, my best friend. I saw her like a sister and when she left I felt betrayed, but no I'm definitely not in love with her" he said as he pulled me to him.

"I'm glad you're not in love with her, I'm not in the mood to deal with a triangle" I teased and Edward chuckled. "Now come on, let's go eat I'm starving" I said and pulled him to the kitchen with me. Just before we entered the kitchen Edward pulled to a stop. "Bella I'm sorry –" before he could finish his apology I cut him off. "If you finish that sentence I swear I'll kick you" Edward looked at me wide eyes.

I sighed and put my hands on his cheek "I don't regret this date Edward, I promise and why would I? I'm here with one of the most sexy doctors on the world who I get the ogle any time I want" I said telling the truth except he was probably the most sexy doctor on the world, but hey no need to boost his ego more than this, right?

"I don't deserve you" he sighed "Too bad, just deal with it" I said and kissed his delicious lips. We walked in the kitchen and went to sit next to Emily who also like Edward wasn't talking a lot. "So Emily we weren't officially introduced, I'm Isabella Swan but just call me Bella" I smiled. "I'm Emily Cle.." she stopped talking and had a frown on her face. "Just Emily, it's nice to meet you Bella" she continued, maybe she didn't like her surname? Hey, it's a possibility.

We ate in silence but it wasn't comfortable, not in the least. I tried to start a conversation by asking Emily if she liked it here, which she did answer but that was that, no further explanation or any questions for me or Edward.

"So I was thinking we could watch a movie or something?" I had to try, the silence was killing me, and it looked like I finally said something right because suddenly Emily had a big smile on her face. "Oh I love watching movies" she said enthusiastically to which Edward replied "That's because you wanted to be an actress Em". Finally! God, they finally talk!

"Yeah, but that didn't turn out the way I wanted" she frowned, "Well, no one but yourself to blame for that, right?" Edward answered coldly. Damn it, I had thanked god too soon. "So what kind of movies do you like?" I asked Emily trying to keep the conversation up. "Uhm, I have always been a fan of Catherine Zeta Jones" she answered softly. "Oh, I like her too. Especially in the movie Chicago, I just love that movie" I replied honestly, I must have watched that movie a thousand times but I would never get enough of it. "Me too! Back in time whenever Edward and I had a movie night I used to beg till he gave in and watched that movie with me" she grinned as Edward grimaced. "Actually, come to think of it, Edward don't you still have that movie?" we both turned to him waiting for an answer that could make us two very happy ladies

Edward cursed silently "Damn it, I was hoping that you didn't remember that but yeah I do". Emily and I grinned at each other while Edward groaned.

Hours later Edward, Emily and I were watching Chicago and whenever a song would come up both Emily and I would both sing along. Edward grimaced through the whole movie but there were moments that I could see a smile tugging on his lips especially when we started singing along.

After the movie we decided that it was time to sleep but Emily felt uncomfortable and wanted to leave. "Emily forget it, you're not leaving" Edward said determined. "But-" before she could complain I walked to her side. "Emily come on, just stay here. I mean look at this house, so damn comfortable. We won't leave this now, would we? Just act like you're home that's what I do" I teased and winked at her.

She finally gave in and after thanking both me and Edward she went to sleep in the guestroom. "Do you really feel home?" Edward asked putting his hands on my waist and his lips on my neck. "With you I feel home wherever I go" I whispered. "Bella I…let's go upstairs" he said but I was so sure that that was not what he wanted to say, but I let it go.

"Baby don't get mad but tomorrow I want you to stay here with Emily, I can go on my own" I told him as we walked in to his room. "What? Bella no, I'm taking you" he shook his head at me. "Edward please, I want you to stay here. You and Emily need some time together so why come to Port Angeles?" "But-" he tried to argue but I wasn't having any of that.

"Look if it makes you feel better I'll call Alice and ask her to come get me, then I won't be alone, okay?" he sighed which meant he was ready to give in "Fine, but I'm calling Alice" he said with a tone that said don't-try-to-argue-on-this-with-me. I nodded with a smile and walked to the bathroom so I could change.

The next morning –yep no funny stuff happened, not that we didn't want it but we were just too tired- Alice came and had breakfast with us. It looked like Alice and Emily had kept contact so Alice knew about Emily's condition and was not surprised to see her.

After Alice said goodbye to them, she went to sit in the car and waited for me. I said goodbye to Emily and also gave her hug letting her know that I was also there in case she needed me. She thanked me and hugged me back. Edward was in the hall moping because he didn't want me to go.

"Please don't go" Edward said and planted kisses on my neck. "I won't if you keep this up, by the way wasn't it your idea to go see my parents?" I asked as I pulled back. "I'm an idiot, don't listen to me" he pouted. "Just a couple days baby, and we'll go back to Iran. Then you'll have me day and night" I promised. "I like the sound of that" he murmured and finally kissed me fully on the lips.

After some very hot making out session Edward pulled back "Now go before I go all caveman and lock you up in my room" he panted. I chuckled and after giving him one last kiss I left. "Call me when you're there!" he yelled as Alice started to pull away. I nodded and waved him goodbye.

"He's in love with you" Alice smirked. "You think?" I asked a bit unsure "Nope" she said popping the 'p' "I know" she said still smirking. I still wonder what it is with the Cullens and their smirking. "So Alice, isn't this the moment where you tell me embarrassing stories about Edward?" I grinned at her.

"I knew you were the perfect girl for Edward the day I met you" she grinned back and told me some funny stories from Edwards childhood. One of their funniest story was when they were 7, they tried to act a couple scenes from the movie Chicago. Alice played Roxie Hart, Emily obviously Velma Kelly and Edward was Billy Flinn. Edward hated it but he did so he could make them happy. I just tried to imagine a little Edward dancing to those songs, or even worse tap-dancing.

Alice dropped me of at Edwards condo where I could take my stuff and my car was also parked there. I hugged Alice and promised her that we would stay in contact.

After that I got in my car and drove to Seattle, ready to face my parents after such a long time.

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	9. Chapter 9

I couldn't sleep for even a second on the plane to Iran, I was too nervous. I needed to see Edward like he needed to see me.

"Can I get you something Miss?" my thoughts were disturbed by a stewardess "Can you make the captain go faster?" I mumbled. "Excuse me?" was her immediate response "Nothing. Can I have a coke?" "Sure" she answered confused. After giving me a coke she left me again alone with my thoughts.

'Hold it together Bella, just hold it together for him' I thought. After a too long flight I finally got to Iran and got a taxi right away. It was already evening in Iran so it could be that Edward was already sleeping or maybe that is what I wanted to believe.

Now if you ask me why all of sudden I'm going to Iran instead of being with my parents? Well I had spent a week with my parents –a very nice week actually- when suddenly I get a call from Alice. She told me that Edward had gone back to Iran. I was a bit mad at him for leaving me alone here, but Alice told me that it was because of Emily.

Emily had again left him for her husband. He got so mad that he decided to leave without telling anybody. So when I got the news I told my parents that they needed me in Iran and only three hours after her phone call I was sitting on plane headed to Iran.

When I finally got there I was hit by a strange sight. Edward, Kate and Garret were sitting outside with a table in front of them that included food and alcohol, lots of alcohol. Kate was sitting on Garret's lap and Edward with his head in his hands.

I sighed and walked to them. Kate and Garret were shocked to see me. I stopped them before they could greet me. They nodded and went inside. "A penny for your thoughts?" I asked softly as I stood in front of him. Edward looked slowly up with a confused expression.

As he realized that I was really standing in front of him his expression changed, I couldn't read him any longer. "You shouldn't be here Bella" he said flatly as he took another sip of his bottle. "But I am" I answered and took the bottle out of his hands.

"Why? So you can leave me for someone else and torture me even more" he said harshly. His words should have hurt me, but they didn't because I knew he didn't mean them, at least that is what I believed.

I took his hands in mine and kissed them one by one. "I'm here Edward, and I'm not leaving even if you throw me away, I will always come back" "Bella" he breathed out.

"I'm here, sssh, I'm here" I said and wrapped my arms around him. "Bella I'm sorry, please, I'm sorry" he pleaded and tightened his hold on me. "It's ok Edward. Stop apologizing, please" this time it was me who was pleading.

After a while I took him to his room and put him in his bed "Sleep with me" he whispered. "Of course. I'm just going to put my bags inside and then I'm coming" I told him and gave a kiss on his cheek. "Please hurry" I nodded at his plead and left his room.

"We tried to talk to him but all he said was Bella. I wanted to call you but your phone was off" Garret said when he saw me. "It's okay Garret. He's fine, I talked to him." I assured him. "If there's anything we can do, please let us now" this time it was Kate that was trying to help.

"That's very sweet Kate, thank you. I'm going to get my bags and then I'm going back to Edward." I said to them and was about to walk outside when Garret stopped me. "I already put them in front of your room. I knew Edward needed you so..." "Thanks Garret, that's really sweet of you" I said with a smile.

"Aah it's nothing. Now you better get back to him, we'll see you in the morning" he answered with a smile. I nodded and walked back to Edwards room. "Bella?" As soon as I opened his door I heard him asking for me.

"I'm here now" I answered softly and went to lie next to him. Edward immediately took me in his arms and I put my arms around his waist. "I want to hate her for doing this to me, but I can't. She was my best friend for years. " he told me in pain.

"Don't hate her. Forget the person she became and remember the good times you had with her. Only think about the girl who was your best friend, not about the one who betrayed you. Just think that you had to come to Iran and you had to leave your best friend behind. Forget what she did to you" I told him with determination because that's what I did during college.

Edward tightened his hold on me "I don't want to Bella. Only you and me now love, no one else. Screw them, screw her. She's not worth my thoughts-" I cut him off before he would say something he would regret "Edward don't say those things. You're mad at the moment, you don't mean them."

"I do Bella. I'm done with her. This is the last time she will be ever mentioned. Only you and me, love...you and me" the way he said those words I couldn't but believe him. "You and me, Edward" I kissed his chest and smiled. We fell asleep in each other's arms and it was definitely the best sleep I had in days.

Being with Edward definitely changed me. Because of him I saw my parents again, because of him I got to feel love again, or maybe I was feeling it for the first time, because the feelings I had for him were feelings I never felt before.

I was still asleep when Edward started planting kisses on my neck. His mouth on my neck? Perfection. Before I realized it a moan escaped my mouth "Good morning, love" his velvet voice said.

"It sure is now" I answered and opened my eyes just to be met by the beautiful sight of the man of my dreams. "We are in Iran" he grinned. I raised an eyebrow as to say 'isn't that obvious', but before those words could leave my mouth Edward started talking. "It's just weird, a couple days ago we were in Washington, you in Seattle, me in Forks and now we are back here, together."

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked him unsure. "Love, this is anything but bad" Edward said with a big smile on that beautiful face of his. "So it's...?" "Amazing. Fantastic. Super. Absolutely great!" he declared. "Now that was what I need to hear." I answered with a smile of my own.

"But it would be greater if I got this" he smirked and before I could ask what he was talking about I felt his lips on mine, and that's the moment I realized how much I had missed it. I responded by kissing him passionately. "Edward" I moaned when his lips left mine and found there place on my neck. "You have no idea how much I missed this, love" he groaned and sucked harder on the spot behind my ear.

But before we could go any further there was a knock on the door, we both groaned in frustration. "Breakfast is ready!" Kate yelled. "We're coming" I yelled back. "First a car, now a doctor. What is the next thing that will disturb us?" Edward grimaced thinking of our first time in Forks when we were kissing and several cars passed causing us to stop. "They are leaving in a couple days and then this place is all ours, and I'm all yours" I said as I played with his hair. He suddenly pulled me on his lap and looked at me with hungry eyes, and I'm not talking about food.

"All mine" he breathed out and kissed me. After some very hot making out session it really hurt me to pull away "Breakfast...Kate and Garret...Ooh Edward" he couldn't pull away which caused me to moan, which caused him to suck even harder on my neck. When I suddenly jumped from his lap, he looked very surprised at me "What? Someone has to put a stop to this...for now" I added the last part with a smirk.

"I am definitely not done with you Miss Swan" he said with a devilish grin and stood up. "I was hoping you weren't" I answered. "Bella please go" Edward looked like he was really holding back when he said that. "What? Why?" I asked confused and a bit hurt. "If you keep staying here, neither of us will be able to go downstairs" he said frustrated. I blushed and nodded in understanding "I will see you in a minute" I winked at him and then walked downstairs.

When I got to the living room I saw two bags at the door. "Guys, are those your bags?" I asked them as I took a place next to Kate. "Yep, we have a flight in three hours" Kate answered. "You're already leaving? Well that is fast" I mumbled the last part. "We wished to stay longer too, but they need us in Port Angeles" Garret said with a smile.

"That's too bad actually. I wish we had some more time together, I was just getting to know you guys." I told them honestly "Maybe you should take the Chief on his offer then?" Kate said.

"He told you about that?" they both nodded. "What offer?" I jumped when I heard Edwards voice. He chuckled and went to sit next to me "So, what is this offer thing about?" Edward asked again when I forgot to answer him because of the beautiful sight in front of me. "Oh yeah that" I said and looked away but not before I noticed the smirk on his face, and the smile on both Kate and Garrets face. Yes I was caught, "Well, the Chief wants me to come and work in his hospital with you guys." I explained to him.

"What do you want?" Edward asked me "I'm not sure. It would be nice to settle you know, but on the other hand I like it here, but I also know that I can't do this for the rest of my life." I answered

"If you want to go to Port Angeles then I'm also going with you. Without you Iran means nothing to me" Edward said as he took my hand in his. "I wasn't planning on going without you either" I replied with a wink. "You guys make such a cute couple" Kate smiled at us. I blushed and looked at my plate. "Kate you embarrassed her, she looks like a tomato" Garret joked. Kate slapped him slightly on the chest "Leave her Garret"

"You and my brother would be very good friends" Edward grinned at him. "You talking about Emmet?" Garret asked and Edward nodded confused "You're right, we are very good friends" Garret told him with a grin.

"But how? I mean you guys came after I left for Iran" Edward said still confused. "You're not the only Cullen at the hospital" "He's talking about McHottie, your dad" Kate added.

"McHottie?" I asked "Yes, that's what every female doctor, and nurses call him" Edward answered "Who knows what Emmet told you about me" he then said to Garret. "Nothing too bad. He misses you and he worries about you, but when I get back to Port Angeles I'll tell him that he doesn't have to worry anymore" Garret added the last part with a look at me and a smirk.

"No he doesn't" Edward answered and put an arm around me. "So, Edward what do they call you at the hospital?" I asked him. "You don't want to know" he groaned. I turned to Kate "Kate?" "Are you sure you want me to tell her McSexward...oops too late" Kate giggled as she looked at Edward.

"Sexward?" I asked confused. "It's my hair. They say that I have sexhair, so that's why they call me Sexward" Edward explained sounding very embarresed. "Aaaaah now I get it...McSexward" I laughed when I heard him groan.

After clearing the table we called a cab and went outside to wait for it. "Kate, Garret it was really great to meet you guys, and I hope that in the future we will all work together." I said as I gave them both a hug "I hope so too Bella, I believe we're going to be great friends!" Kate exhaled with a big smile. "I'm looking forward to see you again Bella and if you need something don't forget that from now one you can also call us" Garret said sounding like an older brother that I wished to have.

"Thanks Garret, we will" I answered "You too McSexward" Garret said as he turned to Edward who grimaced when he heard Garret calling him that "I will if you stop calling me that" Garret nodded with a big smile on his face. "Take care guys and say hi to everyone" Edward added with a smile as they took seat in the cab. After a last wave we walked inside.

"We are alone doctor Swan" Edward said with a mischievous smile, as soon as he said those words we heard someone else "Bella!" it was Angela. I opened the door and was immediately met by a pair of arms that hugged me. "You're back. Finally!" she declared. "Hello to you too Ang" I answered with a grin. "I'm also back, you know" I heard Edward say sarcastically.

"Hello Bella, and we missed you too Edward" she said with a big smile. The first thing I noticed when I looked at Angela was this glow, she looked different, happier but she also looked like she had gained weight. "Angela did you gain weight?" I blurted out. "Okay, that is definitely girl talk, I'm going to unpack my bags and then we're leaving to the hospital" Edward said and went upstairs.

"Well I'm pregnant" she said as if it wasn't obvious "Yeah true, but still it's a bit early, don't you think?" I asked "And you look very happy, ugh something is going. What is going on?". "Maybe I-" before she could start sounding mysterious I cut her off "Cut with crap, tell me what's going on" "I'm pregnant with twins Bella" Angela said with a big smile.

"Oh god Ang, this is amazing. Congratulations. Ben must be so happy!" I was so happy for them, and seeing Angela this good made me even happier. "He's very happy but also nervous. Ben thinks he's going to suck at being a dad, he was scared to have one baby and now we will have two." She told me with a sigh. "Ah no, Ben won't suck at being a dad, I'm absolutely sure that he will be a perfect daddy." "I will pay you if you come and say that to him" Angela said sounding very serious.

"You don't have to pay me. Oh I need to tell this to Edward. Edward?" I yelled his name and heard a door open, then a cry and then a curse "Motherf..." "What happened?" I asked as I went to stand in front of the stairs. "The stupid door hit my foot" he answered and both Angela and I giggled. "I'm sure it was the door" I answered still giggling. "Woman did you call me for this?" he joked.

"Oh right. Edward?" I asked again, "Yes Bella?" he answered very calmly "Angela is pregnant with twins!" I yelled. "Really? Owh! Owh! Owh!" Edward started crying again. I ran upstairs and saw him holding his knee. "I thought you hit your foot?" I asked. "The door hit my foot" he answered with a glare "and now the staircase hit my knee" he answered sulking.

"Oh poor baby, can't even walk without getting hurt" I pouted at him and he glared at me. "Bella everything ok?" Angela yelled still laughing. "Yup, Edward just got hit by the staircase this time. I think this house doesn't like him" I joked. Edward glared at me and started limping to his room. "Stupid house attacks me with no reason and makes these women laugh at me" he muttered while closing his door.

I laughed at him and walked back downstairs. "You look happy" Angela said when I entered the living room. "I am happy" I answered smiling. "No different happy" Angela said shaking her head at me. "I went to see my parents" I told her because that was also one of the reasons I looked happy.

"Bella! That is really good news. I suppose you had a good time since you look so happy?" Angela asked. "Yep, it was nice. It had been a long time since I had seen them you know, and thanks to Edward I finally got the guts to call them and meet them" I told her meaning every single word.

"Edward is doing great things to you" Angela said and made me blush. Of course she didn't knew that I was thinking about the other great things he was doing to me "Bella you're blushing. Oh my god! You and Edward!" she cried out when she understood what my blush was about.

"I will tell you everything after I get ready. We need to go to the hospital, Kate and Garret left so it's back us" I stated and stood up. "Ok, but I want to know every single detail" I nodded at Angela and walked upstairs to my room.

After getting ready me, Edward and Angela left to the hospital. Edward and I both started doing our rounds and were happy to see that a lot of our patients were better, some of them were even signed out. Of course we did have some new patients, but it looked like things were getting better. How wrong I was.

Angela being the curious girl she was demanded every single detail about my 'relationship' with Edward, but the thing was that I wasn't so sure that it was a relationship we had, especially with the way Edward was acting.

He was kind of avoiding me but the thing was that whenever I asked him something he would always answer, so he wasn't really avoiding me right? Who was I kidding, he wouldn't even say a single word if it wasn't for my questions. The answers I got? Cold and short. I didn't understand a bit of it but the only thing this could be about is Emily, or at least the problems he had with her.

I had promised him that I wouldn't say a thing about Emily so I couldn't ask him about that, and whenever I asked him what was wrong he would say nothing and walk away. Me? I was going crazy. Absolutely crazy but all I could do was ask him what was wrong.

We were also sleeping in our own rooms, not together anymore and that caused a lot of sleepless night. Sleeping without Edward was like a child sleeping without her teddy bear, and I needed my teddy bear a lot. Not only I noticed the coldness between me and Edward, but Angela, Ben and even Roma noticed it. They all asked me what was going on but all I could answer was nothing. Ironic isn't it?

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><p>Push the button people, I know you can do it! Pretty please?<p> 


	10. Chapter 10

Two weeks had passed since the first day we came back to Iran, and I was walking home with Angela on my side. Oh yeah, that was another new thing; normally Edward and I would walk home together but now he would leave without me or if he was still at the hospital he would say that I should already go. This was one of those days. Edward was still busy with one of his patients and I was walking home with Angela.

"Bella you should talk to him. I don't understand how you two got from happy to...to" Angela tried to find the right word for what we had become "Cold? Strangers?" I tried. "You could say that" she sighed. "I don't know what to do Ang. Something is bothering him obviously but he won't talk to me. Maybe I should threaten him?" I suddenly came up with that idea but the look on Angela's face told me that the idea wasn't such a good idea.

"Threaten him with what? Spanking? I don't think that is a good idea Bella. Just keep trying to talk to him and give him some time. Tell him that you're there for him, and if that doesn't work, then drive him crazy" Angela said as she stopped walking, when I looked around I saw that we were standing in front of her house. "We already have on crazy person in that house, we don't need a second one" I answered sarcastically.

"Everything will be alright sweetie, don't worry" she said as she gave me a hug. "I hope so Ang" I said as I returned the hug. After saying goodbye she walked inside and I continued my walk home.

I was lost in my thoughts when I suddenly heard a cry. A cry that turned me pale in a second. I started walking to the place from where the sound came. I started hearing more cries but also pleas. Suddenly I heard a small child yell for her mommy. I started running thinking I could save them.

I was running in a small street and over the end at the street was a sight that made my blood boil. There were terrorists holding a woman by her hair and a small child by the waist. They were both crying in pain, but the woman's cry stopped when the terrorist held a gun to the child's head.

She pointed at herself as in meaning that they should take her and not the baby girl. I didn't even realize that I had stopped running, but seeing that sight made me go crazy. I want to go and save them but right when I was trying to run someone pulled me aside. I wanted to cry but the person shut my mouth by placing his hand on it.

This was it I was dead, just like that woman and child. I couldn't do anything, I couldn't save them, myself or Edward. He would be alone now and blame himself for this. I tried to get away from the man but his hold on me was so tight, and he was whispering things in my ear that I didn't understand. I was completely lost.

"Bella, you're scaring me. Please, it's me" the voice said and that's when I realized that I knew this voice. It was the voice I wanted to hear every second of my life. The voice that could bring me back from anything. But I couldn't say anything, I kept watching the woman and the child.

I heard two shots, two cries, a gasp, a sob and then silence. Nothing but silence.

Edward was taking me home but was it my legs that were walking or his arms that dragged me home; I had no idea. Everything was surreal. He kept whispering things in my ear but nothing, I could hear nothing. I wanted to, I wanted to tell him that I loved him and that I would not let that happen to us; but I couldn't.

"Bella please talk to me" Edward begged and that's the moment I snapped back into reality. "I love you Edward, please...please don't leave me. Please talk to me, I'm here for you. Please don't let me go" I begged and held onto him for dear life. I didn't even realize that I was crying until he wiped away my tears.

"Bella, my Bella I will never let you go. I love you, of course I do. I'm sorry for-" I couldn't hear his apologies, I had already heard what I needed to hear. Edward loved me, he wouldn't let me go. "Love me" I said flatly "I do love you" he answered not understanding what I was talking about. "No Edward, make love to me. Make me yours. Prove that you love me" I said looking in his eyes with determination.

"But Bella-" I cut him off before he could come up with reasons to not do this "Please" I whispered. That was all it took for him to agree. We walked upstairs to his room in silence. Silence that was both killing me and him, but it was silence that was going to be followed by our love so I took it without regret.

We undressed in silence keeping our eyes locked with each other's. I saw pain, lust and most importantly love in his eyes, and I was hoping he was seeing the same in my eyes except for the pain. I didn't want to be the one that caused the pain in his eyes. He took me in his arms and placed me gently on his bed. "I love you my Bella" he kept repeating while kissing my face, neck, arms, shoulders...any place he wanted.

He kept repeating it when he entered me in one swift motion. I didn't even budge, I didn't even feel pain, all I felt was love, his love. "Love me Edward" I asked. He nodded and started moving slowly. Edward kept his eyes locked on me, his hands were holding me tightly, and my legs were securely wound around his waist. He kept going on slowly showing me how much he loved me, never increasing the pace.

"I love you my Bella" he whispered in my ear, and that was the moment we both came. We kept holding on to each other, eyes locked, hands held very tightly. I was totally consumed by him as he was by me.

"I love you Edward" I said to him, and then we both fell asleep in each other's arms.

I was still in the same street, Edward was not here. We didn't made love or confess our love. I was all alone, except for the woman and the child. This time there was no one who was holding me, trying to stop me from seeing them, but still I couldn't move. I was frozen to my place.

They were going to die and there was nothing I could do. The baby girl looked at me in pain. Tears were streaming on her face. She kept looking at me, not once did she move her eyes away from mine. She stopped crying and mouthed 'Help'. I wanted to do but before I could do something she was shot. She died with her eyes still locked on mine.

I woke up gasping for air. I looked around and saw that Edward was still sleeping. Everything started to come back. The terrorists, the woman, the child, Edward, me. We had made love. He made love to me because I had begged for it. I stood up and took the first piece of clothing I found.

I walked downstairs and avoided mirrors at any cost. I was probably looking like hell. I couldn't believe I had done this to him while he was dealing with his own demons. But with me being so desperate he couldn't say no.

I couldn't believe I saw a woman and a child being murdered in front of me. It's a sight that will never leave my head, and my nightmares neither. I let the tears fall freely and even enjoyed for a minute that I could let it out from the first time. Normally it would take months, years before I could let go something that happened to me.

After some good crying I went back upstairs and went to sit next to the open window in Edward's room since I didn't feel like sleeping at all. I watched the houses, the streets. Everything looked so peaceful and beautiful, you wouldn't even think that this place was being terrorized.

I watched the sun come up which meant I had been sitting here for quite a while. I turned to look at Edward and was surprised to see him awake. "How long-" "Did you-" we both started on the same time. I pointed at him to say that he should go first. He sighed "Did you even sleep Bella?"

"How long have you been awake?" I asked not answering his question. "Five minutes tops. What about you? Did you sleep Bella?" he asked again. I sighed and turned to look outside. "I slept" I answered, after all he asked me if I had slept. "Are you ok?" he asked worried. I didn't turn around to answer him I just nodded.

"Damn it Bella talk to me" he said sounding irritated. "Look who's talking" I answered coldly. I heard him stand up and walk to either outside or to his bathroom. I jumped when he slammed the door harshly. "It was not supposed to be like this" I heard him repeating in the bathroom.

He was silent for a moment and then I heard the door open again. "Bella it was not supposed to be like this. Not like this" he whispered in pain as he came to sit in front of me. "Please forgive me, please" he pleaded. I turned to look at him in confusion. "What are you talking about Edward?"

"I shouldn't have taken advantage of you yesterday. Not in that state" he answered looking very hurt. "That was not your fault. I pushed you. I wanted it. I'm the one who should be apologizing Edward" I said stubbornly. "I don't understand" Edward said frustrated.

"Just leave it. I'm outta here" I stood up and started walking to the door, but I didn't get so far because Edward stopped me by holding my arm. "We're going to talk this through Bella"

"Oh are we now?" I asked sarcastically "Well I have a clear answer for you. Nothing, it's nothing. Got it now?" I used the same answer he always gave me when I asked him what was wrong. Normally I would have left but he was still holding me by my arm. "After nothing I'm supposed to leave Edward, remember?"

"Stop this" he demanded. "Let go of me Edward, I want to go. I don't have time for regret and stuff" I said looking away from him. "You think I regret this?" he asked sounding mad. "I don't know what to think anymore!" I yelled in frustration. "Oh really and what about me. You tell me that you love me and the next morning you are acting all cold and harsh"

"I don't want you to feel guilty for what happened Edward" I told him honestly. "Bella, the only reason I felt guilty was because I thought that I had taken advantage of you"

I looked him straight in the eye and for a minute I felt strong and like I was doing the right thing. "Edward Anthony Cullen I love you. I love you so much I can't even describe how much" I didn't know what to expect so I was definitely surprised when Edward took me by my hair, pulled me to him and kissed me. After a while I started kissing him back. It soon turned into a very heated passionate make out session. "I love you doctor Swan. I love you even though I sometimes think you're crazy" he teased and continued kissing me.

"It's still early" I said looking at the clock on his wall. "You're right we have enough time to do some stuff" he smirked at me. "And what did you have in mind?" I asked innocently "Something that does not include this" he took of the shirt I was wearing "and this" this time he took the sheet that was strapped around his body. We both looked at each other and sighed contently. "You're so beautiful that even beautiful doesn't describe it Bella" "Perfection is what I see when I look at you Edward"

"I love you" he said and pulled me to him placing his lips on mine. Our kiss turned hot and very passionate. I placed my legs around his waist as he pushed me to his bathroom door. I was ready to beg when he suddenly entered me. We both moaned in delight. "Please, Edward " I begged needing him to go faster. "Oh fuck Bella, I love you so much" he groaned.

After we finished our 'stuff' we were both very satisfied and happy. We were grinning like idiots and walking around holding hands. When Angela saw us she smiled and winked at us but didn't approach us knowing that we needed some time alone.

"Let's have lunch together. I still have some questions for you" I said as we walked in to the hospital "The same goes for you Bella" he answered as he pulled me to him. "What do you mean?" I thought he was the one with the issues "Bella are you really okay? I mean what happened yesterday…I thought I was going to be the one to break down, but I didn't because I have you, but is it also the same for you?" he was worried about me and to be honest he had every right to.

"I don't know Edward. I mean yes I didn't break down because of you but am I really ok? I don't know...I think I am but it could also be that I'm still in shock you know. What happened yesterday is something I never had seen before and I never want to see it again and it scared me. It scared me like hell but I am with you and this feels so right and I...you know... I just...I should stop rambling" that's me being nervous. There was so much that I wanted to say and tell but I couldn't get it out.

"I promise you Bella it will get better. We'll get through this, and this" he pointed at us "is absolutely right" he said and planted a kiss on my forehead. "You're right" I sighed and pulled away from him "Now go, we need to work" I said and gave him kiss on the lips.

"See you later, love" he said and started to walk away. Right when I was about to walk away too Edward stopped me "Oh Bella" I turned around and looked curiously at him "Yes Edward?" "You're cute when you ramble" he grinned "I hate you" I mumbled as a blush rose on my cheeks. "Love you too!" He yelled still grinning. I shook my head and walked away with a big smile on my face.

Edward and I had lunch with Angela and Ben. It would have been nice if Angela wouldn't have been nervous the whole time. "Ang what is wrong?" I asked her a bit frustrated that she wouldn't tell me what was going through her head. "Nothing Bella" she answered nervously. "I really hate that word" I said irritated. "You hate your name?" Edward teased. "Ha-ha very funny mister" I glared at him. "Bella can I have a word with you?" Angela asked me as she fidgeted with her dress. "Finally" I exhaled and stood up.

"Now?" she asked looking afraid. "I'm not going to bite you Ang" I said to which Edward coughed trying to stifle his laughter. I gave him a pointed look "It's not like she's a vampire or something, right?" Edward teased looking at me. I blushed at the memory. I might have bitten him when I was riding out my orgasm. "Let's go Ang" I chuckled.

"Sure" she said and followed me. We walked to my small office in the hospital. "Now will you tell me why you are so nervous? And don't try to say it's nothing because I swear to god I will explode" I said very seriously . "I think you already exploded, honey" she smiled. "Funny" I said dryly "now start talking woman" I said to her and in a second she turned from teasing Angela to very nervous and serious Angela.

"Bella you have to promise me that you won't be mad at me and that you won't kill me. Actually you can't kill me because I'm pregnant" she babbled "Angela, get to the point" "I'm leaving Iran" she told me. For a minute I couldn't say a thing. My best friend was leaving me "I'm not mad" I felt the need to assure her that I wouldn't kill her. "But?" "I think I understand why you want to go but that doesn't mean that I'm completely okay with it" I continued.

She sighed "It's just I don't want my babies growing up here and neither does Ben. We want our babies to grow in a nice environment, and maybe later on you can also move back. This doesn't have to be goodbye, you know. I mean you're not going to spend the rest of your life here now are you?" she had a point there "No I'm not, actually I got a nice offer" I told her with a smile.

"Oh really? What kind of an offer?" she asked curiously "When I was in Port Angeles with Edward, I helped a bit in the hospital he works. Later on the chief asked me if I wanted the join them" she looked very surprised probably because I hadn't told her earlier. "That's a nice offer, and you and Edward would be working together, and we'll still be able to see each other you know. I'm only in Seattle, not in Jamaica or something" she joked.

"You're right but I'm not going to Port Angeles right away. I still want to spend here some time. I can't just drop everything and leave you know?" I answered "You're right but uhmmm are we ok?" She asked nervously. "Am I really scaring you that much?" I asked with raised eyebrows. "Well, you're a bit intimidating" she mumbled. I laughed out loud at that. Me...Bella Swan intimidating? Too funny. But my laughter was cut short when I saw that Angela wasn't laughing with me.

"You're serious" I stated. She nodded softly. "Well I'll be damned. Haven't heard that one before" she shrugged at my response. "I was scared for your reaction, not for you honey. So don't let it get to your head" I huffed at what she said. "Best friends?" she asked. "Duuh!" I yelled and hugged her to me. "You scared me for a moment with the serious face" she said as she hugged me tightly. "I understand why you're doing this and I agree with you but I'm going to miss you, that is for sure" I said as we walked back to our men. Oh yeah, my man.

"They look good" Ben said as he looked at us. "Yep, they have talked" Edward nodded with his eyes on us too. "Then it's time we have a talk too Edward" Ben said as he turned to Edward. "I think so too Ben" Edward replied very seriously as he looked at Ben. They were both silent for a minute and kept looking at each other.

"What are we actually talking about?" Edward said and turned to look at me. I laughed and went to sit next to him but he wouldn't have that. He took me on his lap and kissed me on the lips "I love you" "I love you" I said back "Ben and Angela are leaving" I told him with a sigh. "Oh they are?" he murmured against my neck. "Yep, it's only me and you now". "Look Angela, no worries Bella already forgot you" Ben teased.

"Leave the girl Ben. She finally is not moody anymore. Let's keep it that way" Angela teased back. "Oh aren't you two just perfect for each other" I said sarcastically to them. "Abso-freaking-lutely" Angela exhaled and kissed Ben. "You ok?" Edward asked softly so they wouldn't hear it. "Yeah...but it also means that I'll annoy you more now since Angela is leaving" I answered teasing him. "I don't care as long as I have you" he whispered and then kissed me.

"Lunch is over people, now instead of sucking each other's face go heal some patients" Ben said and stood up. "You should talk. I am not the one who knocked up his wife" I replied facing Ben. "Yes but dear Bella let me teach you a lesson. Knocking up your wife - which includes sucking each other's face and other things- is something you do after healing your patients" he said acting all serious. "Ben?" Angela asked looking a bit disgusted. "Yes my dear wife?" he answered with a grin. "Could you please shut up" she demanded. Ben looked surprised but nodded, to which we all laughed. Ben and Edward left together to see their patients and Angela and I walked back to our patients.

"Oh Ang, have you seen Roma?" I asked since I hadn't seen her for a while. I was a bit worried that something had happened to her. "She's staying with her mother. Roma got in a fight with her husband" I gasped at Angela's reply. Roma never had a fight with her husband. "But she never has a fight with her husband. They love each other very much" "Yes Bella, but every couple fights once in a while" she explained as if I didn't know that. "True, but I wouldn't go to my mother if I had fight with Edward" I said stubbornly.

"Sweetie your mother is in I-don't-know-where-land, so you obviously wouldn't go to her" she chuckled. "That's not the reason smart-ass, I've always wanted to have make-up sex. They say it's very hot" I smirked at her. "Don't let Edward hear that, otherwise you'll have a fight every day" she laughed. "Hmm, maybe I should" I said in thought. "You're crazy" she said and walked away. "So are you" I yelled back laughing. What was it with people saying thing and then walking away?

"Are you really ok with Angela and Ben leaving?" Edward asked me later on that night. We had a nice dinner and were now sitting on the front porch, me between Edwards legs and let me tell you something, it feels very nice. "I don't know. The offer I got from the chief is starting to be more appealing. I have known Angela for a long time and even though I have you I think I will be a bit lost without her. She's the girl with whom I share my most craziest things" I told him thinking about the couple of times me and Angela had gotten drunk.

When Ben had told us what we had done all night long, we decided to not drink anymore, and if we would drink then we would lock our door so we couldn't get out of the house...long story. "Like?" Edward murmured as he planted soft kisses on my neck. "Hmm...like how much I would love to have make-up sex with you" now that got his attention. "We need to fight to have make-up sex" I agreed with him. "Let's fight" he suddenly said as if he got a brilliant idea.

"Uhm no. I'm not in the mood for fighting" I replied hugging him closer to me. I was sure that we would definitely have a fight without wanting it, so no reason to fake one. "But I'm in the mood for the sexpart" he whined. "I said I'm not in the mood for fighting" I said as I turned to him. "The sexpart is something I will always want" I smirked, but before we could start something that definitely included sex we were interrupted by a phone call.

"Hi mom" Edward said as he answered the phone. "Yes, she's here. Okay I'll give here" he said and handed the phone to me. "You would think that since I'm here son she would want to talk to me" Edward mumbled as I chuckled. "Hi Esme, how are you?" I said smiling at Edward. "Fine sweetie, you? I hope Edward is treating you right. Oh btw how are things between you two. Oh and how are things with Emily?" Damn the woman could talk. "Uhm I'm fine thank you. He's treating me very well. Edward and I are great, and we have talked that topic through and decided to leave it at that" I said answering all the questions.

"Geese mom, one question at a time" Edward yelled at the phone. "Oh sorry sweetie, I just talk a bit too much sometimes" she chuckled. "Ah it's ok Esme, I don't mind" I said honestly. I love...loved talking to Esme. She was an amazing woman. "Oh Bella, has Edward already asked you?" she answered sounding very giddy. "Has Edward asked me what?" I asked with narrowed eyes. Suddenly the phone was out of my hand and at Edwards ear "No mom, I haven't but thanks for asking" Edward replied sarcastically.

I was really curious what they were talking about, but there conversation turned to the 'how are you', 'how is work' etc... After Edward and I said goodbye to Esme, I looked at Edward expecting an answer. "Why are you looking at me with the tell-me-now-or-I'll-kill-you-eyes?" Edward said nervously as he looked away. "You know why mister. Now tell me, what is it that you're going to ask me?" I was a woman on a mission, and my mission was to get the answer out of Edward.

"Alice-dear had asked mama-dear to ask me to ask you if you would like to spend some time with her" he said avoiding my eyes. "Edward I'm a terrible liar but so are you" I answered very calmly. "Woman it's nothing" he said to which I gave him a pointed look. "Uhm it is not anything?" he said trying to correct himself. "Pff fuck you" I stood up and walked to the bathroom. "Please!" I giggled at his plead.

Things were good now, but soon that would change.

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><p>There you have it people. Three chapters in a row, now did I earn a review or not? Come on people, give me some reviews and I'll give you the next chapter :D<p> 


	11. Chapter 11

Hello ~_smiles sheepishly~. _I know some of you out there want to kill me for posting late, even I want to! But please do forgive because here I am with a new chapter :))

But first of all thank you to my few reviewers and I got lots of story alerts which I'm so damn happy with but please also leave me a review so I can know your thoughts on my story. They are really important to me. Again thank you for the ones that did review, you people bring a big smile on my face! :D

Also there will be an outtake of Bella her week with her parents, since it wasn't really essential to the storyline I decided to post an outtake. Quinzy this is for you!

A is for Angel you're really sweet and stuck with me from the beginning. Thank you so much for your lovely reviews ;)

Now people, we are nearing the end. Only chapter and a epilogue left after this chapter. I told you this wouldn't be a long story.

After this I will start with a very funny and lemony story. I'm done with the drama.

And I'm done now too, because I talk too much!

Have fun reading :))

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><p>Cold. It was so cold because we were outside. Tears. The little child was looking at me with tears in her eyes. 'You're too late' she mouthed. I woke up gasping for air. This was the third time I had this dream, and each time it was the same dream. I didn't understand it, did it mean something. Was it my fault she died? Could I have saved her?<p>

Edward thinks I'm crazy for thinking that but I'm still not sure. It wouldn't leave me, everywhere I looked I saw that little child. I couldn't even pass that street anymore and Edward also didn't leave me alone any longer, but for that I was happy.

There was only one thing we both didn't look forward to and that was 'the talk'. We still hadn't talked about Edward's issues. He was avoiding it but since the exchange of our 'I love you's, he turned back to the Edward I love.

But that didn't change the fact that at some point he could again turn cold and harsh. I told him that and he promised me he would explain what happened. It had been two weeks now and I still didn't receive an explanation. That was about to change because that night, the night that changed my whole life, he gave me my explanation.

"So we have wine, check, chips, check, we have Edward and Bella, check" I smiled at him. I was doing this so he could feel comfortable. "I love you" he said as he wrapped his arms around me and breathed me in. "I love you too baby, but you're not getting out of this" I said and got out of his embrace.

"Take a seat" I said to a pouting Edward. He took my hand and made us both sit "If we are really talking about this, then I want to have you as close to me as possible" I sighed and kissed him and then placed my head on his chest.

"I'm scared Bella," he said after a long silence and my heart broke for him "after what Emily did to me I couldn't trust anyone anymore but then you came along and I slowly started to trust someone that was not my family."

At that point I wanted to hate Emily, I wanted to go back to Forks and kick her ass, but it was not my place. I nodded for him to continue.

"I was getting there. God, how many times did I try to say I love you to you" he sighed "you're not alone on that part" I mumbled. "When I saw Emily there, in my house, on my couch, I freaked out. She was my best friend, so I was not about to show her the door,"

"She told me that Sam cheated on her with her own cousin Leah and that it was not the first time, but he always apologized and begged her not to leave. Then one day she caught them and that was it, she left him and had nowhere to go. So she went to my place,"

I listened to him intently and for a small moment I felt bad for Emily. I'm sure it must hurt to be cheated on. I never went through that, I went through worse.

He went on "I wanted to be there for her and show her that even though she left me, I was not going to leave her alone. Then that fucker Sam came to our place, I was about to knock some senses in his head when Emily stopped me,"

"I thought she would say something along the lines of 'He's not worth it, Edward'" he chuckled humorlessly "But do you know what the fuck she said 'Don't do it Edward, he's the father of my unborn child' and like that wasn't enough she left with him after he begged for a minute or two" his tone was cold and harsh again, but this time I understood. Emily had again chosen her man above her best friend again. She stabbed him twice in the back.

"I told her to stay, that I would help her through this, but she didn't want her child to not know her father. How idiotic is that, she knows he will continue cheating on her?" I think he was asking that to himself.

But I did understand Emily on the part of not wanting her child to not know her of his father, but she was still wrong.

"Which brings us to now, I was afraid to face you Bella. I was afraid that if I let my guard down with you that you would also leave me. It was wrong I know, but she fucked me up. She made it hard for me to think that not everyone is like her, especially you" now I understood him, he didn't want me to get too close.

I was silent for a minute and then decided to speak up "Thank you for telling me this and I'm not mad at you for thinking that Edward. I understand it but you can trust me. I will not let you down, I would never do that. You are it for me, you're my hero, my prince on the white horse. I would hurt myself before I could hurt you-" "Don't say that Bella" he huffed.

"But I mean it, and I will also hurt any person that hurts you Edward. I know you need time to fully trust someone, and I respect that. I will show you every day of my life that I will not let you down and that I will always love you" I was getting emotional, and I really had to get it out before I started to cry.

He made me look up at him, and what I saw in his eyes were anything but doubt. Edward knew that he could trust me, that I loved him with all my heart. "I'm so sorry that she did that to you" I whispered as a tear rolled down on my cheek. He kissed it away.

"I love you so much" he whispered in my ear and then softly kissed my lips. It was slow, passionate and so damn real. Damn it, I miss them so much.

"I love you too baby, but I would also love to drink up that bottle of wine" I said trying to lighten the mood. He chuckled and went to grab for our glasses which meant I had succeed.

Edward gave me my glass and took his and then held high, I did the same. "To us, love" he smiled at me "To us" I agreed and then we both sipped our wine.

"You know love, you still didn't tell me how it went with your parents?" that question alone brought a big smile on my face. "It was amazing Edward. I hate myself for not doing this earlier and if it weren't for you, it may have never happened" I said as Edward placed his head on my lap.

While I played with his hair and told him about my trip, he listened intently to me. "The first hours, or should I say day was actually very emotional. I would tell them stuff and then mom would cry because she wasn't there and her crying caused me too cry and then dad followed too. Come to think of it, it was pretty funny" I grinned at him.

"I think we should go back" Edward said as he looked up at me. "Because I want to meet your parents, and I also want to visit my parents. I want them all to meet as soon as possible, so they can all be on our wedding" Now how wrong was it for me to sip my wine?

Very wrong, because I just spitted it back out the moment he said our wedding. What? I was in shock! "Ughh Bella come on, I didn't ask you for any wine" he groaned.

"You! You..You" I stammered as an idiot "You didn't even propose!" I finally got it out. He stood up and looked at me with a smile. Then he turned around and was about to walk away. "Where are you going?" I asked confused. "Just let me clean up beautiful, I will be back in a second" he chuckled and walked upstairs.

Me? I was confused, a bit angry too. Edward just left without an explanation. Okay, he did say that he would come back, but still!

When a couple minutes later Edward came back, I noticed that he had changed his shirt and had washed his face. He walked to me with a nervous smile on his face. "What is going on?" I asked him also very nervous.

"Please, just don't kick me after what I'm about to say right now?" he pleaded seriously which made my eyes widen. I nodded at him. "Okay, here we go" he muttered more to himself and then sank down on one knee. I gasped not knowing what to say.

"Bella Swan, when I first saw you-" I cut him off because well yeah, I couldn't wait. I mean I love speeches, but that was one speech that was just making me wait for the best thing. We couldn't have that now, right? "Just ask the question" I said gasping. Edward beamed at me and then "Will you please marry me?"

"Do you promise that when I'm sick, you will make my food and when I'm irritated you won't get mad at me?" He looked at me with furrowed eyebrows. "I promise baby, please marry me?"

"Yes baby, as cliché as it sounds, a hundredth times yes!" I answered with tears in my eyes and went down on my knees too so I was on the same level as him. "Oh shit, I'm an idiot" he said and slapped his forehead.

"Just one more time," Edward said and took a box out of his pocket "will you marry me?" Edward opened the box and the most beautiful ring I ever saw was reached out to me.

"Yes my Edward" I whispered as a tear rolled down on my cheek. He took my hand and placed the beautiful ring with a not too big rock on my fingers. It was simple and yet so outstanding. "I can't believe you said yes" he said more to himself. I shut him up by placing my lips on his.

Since he was still one on knee and I attacked him like an animal we fell on the ground with me on top of him. "Hi" I smiled at him. "Hello soon to be Mrs. Edward Cullen" he smiled back. "Please make love to me" I whispered to him. He stood up and gently took me with him and then he pulled me in his arms. "Anything you want love, you gave me the world and I will try my whole life to give you the universe"

Damn him and his beautiful lines, they always made me cry. Edward kissed each tear away and took me upstairs. We slowly undressed each other and then made love countless times.

I think it was three in the morning when we had finally fallen asleep. Not fifteen minutes later we were woken up by a loud banging on our door. Edward was still sleeping and I was too afraid to go and see who it was by my own. So I woke him up "Edward" I shook him slightly. "She said yes" he mumbled slowly.

I wanted to laugh at him because he was so damn cute but the banging continued. "Edward wake up" I said more loudly. "Bella?" he asked sleepily but then he heard the banging, and then he was wide awake. "I'm scared" I said and nodded to the door. "Get dressed and wait here for me. If I don't come up in five or you don't hear anything from me, hide under the bed or in the closet. Understand?" He said as he got dressed.

"What? No, I'm not leaving you alone" I protested. Edward took my hands and looked me in the eyes, fully dressed now. "Please just stay here. I'll be fine and I'll be back in a sec okay. Don't worry" he told me and he was quit convincing but I saw in his eyes that he wasn't sure of that himself.

I nodded softly and then gave him a good hard kiss. "I love you" I said as he pulled away. "I love you Bella" then he was gone. I immediately got dressed and heard Edward open the door. "It's Roma!" he yelled and I sighed in relief. For a minute I was so damn scared, but then it struck me that Roma was here, which meant something was wrong. How right I was.

I walked downstairs and saw Roma with tears on her face. Her eyes were wide and full of fear. When she saw me, she ran to me and hugged me. I hugged her back and was concerned that her husband had done something to her.

"Sweetie what's going on?" I asked as I pulled her to the couch with me. "I'm going to get her some water" Edward said and walked to the kitchen. "It's over" she kept whispering. Edward gave Roma the water and then looked at me with a concerned face.

Roma wouldn't drink the water so I took it and placed the glass on the table. I thought her relationship with her husband was over. Again, how wrong was I. "Honey, what is over?" I asked her as I wiped away her tears.

"We, our village, the people. We'll die soon" the color drained from both Edwards and my face when we heard her. "What are you talking about?" Edward asked as he came to stand in front of her. "The terrorist they took our village over. The people in the villages around us are already dead. They took us as last because we're the biggest" she explained.

"Airports! Can we just take a flight and leave?" I don't know how Edward could speak because I felt like I couldn't breathe anymore. "No" she cried "Every place is surrounded by them. They are getting closer and closer to us. We have only a couple days left"

"We were going to get married" I whispered. Edward looked at me with a pained expression and Roma looked shocked. "What?" she said and then took my hand. "I want to be married to you Edward. I want to be yours before we d-" he cut me off with a pointed finger "Don't you dare even say that Bella. Nothing is going to happen, ok?" He knew it wasn't true but if that was what he wanted to believe then what could I say.

"Get married here" Roma said suddenly. "Tomorrow morning, or actually today in a few hours. I'll get a priest here. We can do this. The terrorist aren't in our area yet" she explained. Edward and I looked at each other with hope. "Let's do it" we both said at the same time. "Okay, be ready at 7. I'll be here with the priest" Roma said as she stood up.

"Roma, can you do one thing for me?" I asked "Wake Angela and Ben when you pass their house and please send them here." She nodded and walked to the door. "And take care of yourself" I added. "You too. I'll see you later" then she was gone.

Edward and stood there, both not saying a thing. We were scared, actually terrified for what was to come.

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><p>Leave me some love people. In the name of Edward and Bella...^^<p> 


	12. Chapter 12

Hey guys,

thanks for still being with...uhm well if you are :) This is the last chapter of With All I have, jup it's finished.

A lot of you will probably not like it, let me just say writing the end was hard. But read it first and the epilogue too and if you still want an alternate ending, just let me know and I will post it. I already have it ready, I just would like to hear your thoughts on this first.

Hope you enjoy, and sorry for the long waiting :/

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><p>"I can't believe this. My babies, they…they won't live. We will all die," Angela sobbed loudly as Ben tried to comfort her. "We will not die okay?" Edward dragged a hand through his hair which meant he was nervous. "Angela stop crying, everything will be okay. Our people will come save us" he told her in a soothing voice but if he believed that himself, I cannot tell.<p>

Ben gave a kiss on Angela's temple and sighed "He's right baby, you shouldn't stress this much. It's not good for the baby's" "I'm sorry baby, it's because of the hormones…partly" she whispered the last part. It wasn't just the hormones, she was right, this was going to be our end. "Bella, can I talk to you in the kitchen?" Edward asked softly. I nodded and walked silently to the kitchen.

Edward was immediately by my side "How are you holding up?". I didn't know how to answer that simple question, so many thoughts were running through my head at that moment. "I'm fine…I think" I answered warily. He held me close to him and played with my hair for a while. I was content just being in his arms like that.

"So in less than two hours you will be Mrs. Cullen, what do you think about that?" he asked probably trying to lighten the mood. "Can I answer that question when I am Mrs. Cullen?" I didn't have a proper answer…yet. "Of course love, but would you agree to taking a shower with me now?" he looked at me with pleading eyes. "I would love to" I answered with a forced smile.

Edward took my hand in his and walked to the living room. "Ben, Angela? Bella and I are going to get ready upstairs. You guys wait here, or you can eat breakfast in the kitchen. We will be back in a few" he told them. Angela, who looked a bit better at that point, and Ben nodded and walked to the kitchen.

We walked up the stairs and then to our bathroom still not uttering a word. Cloth by cloth they were dropped on the floor and then we were both in the shower letting the hot water run freely over us. We didn't feel the need to talk or to speak, we just enjoyed each other's presence. He would kiss me softly on the lips and then hold me close to him as the water cascaded on our bodies.

I was so afraid at that moment that a loud bang would cut the silence shortly and make reality come back because Edward and I were in our own world. A world where no one could harm us, a world where we lived in peace, a world that was all about us.

After our shower we got dressed. We didn't care of how we looked, we just wanted to get married. Edward and I smiled at each other when we saw that we matched. I was wearing a white blouse and a black pencil skirt and he was wearing black pants and a white shirt. The tie was missing, otherwise it would have been the perfect picture. "No tie?" I asked. "I like it this way, you don't?" he arched an eyebrow "I love you any way my soon to be husband" I smiled and leaned in to give him a kiss.

"I'm sorry I don't do any of that until I'm married" he teased, I scoffed "That's not what you said when you were screaming my name as you came tonight?" I replied. "Oh well in that case," he pulled me to him and kissed me very deeply and passionately. It was kiss I will never forget. I felt it in my toes.

"Roma and the priest are here!" Ben yelled. "We're coming!" Edward yelled back. "Are you ready love?" Edward asked me "Isn't it weird that there's a Christian priest here in Iran that will get us married?" I blurted out, yeah I know this is not the answer you give at a question like that but it just popped out. "Not really, there are lots of towns where in Iran where Christians live, including this town, so I guess we're lucky" he chuckled.

"I'm ready Edward" I looked him in the eye and smiled at him. He smiled back at me and took my hand. "Dum-dum-dumdum" he hummed softly which caused me to smile wider. We walked together to the priest and introduced ourselves.

Soon we were changing vows and saying the "I do's". Angela, Ben and Roma clapped for us when the priest announced us wife and husband. God, how happy we were. Still in our own world. It felt so good but still so painful because we knew. We knew that sooner or later this happiness would end. Darkness would follow. Pain would follow.

The priest blessed us all and then quickly went away. The poor man was scared too. "I'm so happy for you two and I'm so glad you actually did get married" Roma hugged us both. "You're right Roma. Congrats guys" Ben said and came to hug us too. "Let's give the newlyweds some time alone" Angela told them. She still looked pretty shaken up. "Angela," I started but got cut off by her. "It's okay Bella, come on Ben" she walked out of our house with a sighing Ben and Roma following her.

"We are married" I stated in shock. "That we are Mrs. Cullen" my beautiful husband grinned at me. I still couldn't wrap my head around the fact that we got married. "My beautiful wife, we still have two hours before we have to go to the hospital and I do think we should have a small celebration of our own…in our bedroom" he winked at me.

"Say it again" I whispered. "What?" he asked confused. "Wife, you called me your wife" I got choked up again. "Oh Bella, my beautiful wife, my one and only wife. You're mine Mrs. Cullen, you're mine for life" he dipped down to capture my lips with his.

"I'm yours my handsome husband" I answered. Suddenly he smirked at me "Edward?" before I could say anything else he picked me up. "What the?" I yelled out in surprise. He just laughed at me "At least let me carry you while walking up the stairs, it's not the traditional threshold but still…" I laughed at him "Please do Mr. Cullen". "I love it when you call me that" he replied.

So that's what I did when he walked the stairs up. I whispered it in his ear and placed soft kisses on his neck and jaw. When he entered our room, he just threw me on the bed and made love to me for the first time as my husband. It was the day he gave me the best present ever.

Two hours later we were dressed and ready to go work. We should have not been this happy but we were but we were scared that any time soon our bubble would burst. Our hospital was almost empty which was crazy with the war going on. It should have been full. Not that I wanted people to be lying in the hospital but it just didn't make sense.

We rather had them in the hospital than at a place where we couldn't help them. "Where in the hell are those people?" Edward said very frustrated. "In hell, that's where they are and where we will be soon" Angela answered harshly. "Angelaaa" I tried but was cut off by Edward. "What is wrong with you? Why do you keep saying that? Do you want to die or something?"

"Of course not! But acting like everything is going to be okay doesn't make it any better either" Angela replied harshly. Ben and I looked at each other, both not knowing what to do or to say. "Do you think repeating that we're going to be ok will make it more real? Please Edward, are you serious?" she was really pushing his buttons and we all knew it.

Edward was about to reply when suddenly we heard people crying and screaming. We heard loud bangs which we recognized as bombs. They were dropping bombs on houses. "Oh god" all blood drained from our faces. "We have to get out of here" Ben yelled. "It's too dangerous!" Edward yelled back. "Staying inside is worse, they could drop a bomb here any second now!" Ben replied.

We all looked at Edward and waited for his answer. "We're going out" he said and then looked at me "come stand with me" I obliged and went to stand next to him. He took hold of my hand and I was sure Ben did the same with Angela, who was a sobbing mess at that moment. We opened the door of my office and saw people running and screaming, some covered in blood.

We ran outside and saw that almost every house was burning. "Let's go to the church a couple street further" Ben suggested. Edward looked back at the hospital and then nodded "Ben take them to the church, I will be there in few" he said as he tried to hand me over to Ben

"What? Why? Where are you going?" I was going crazy at the idea of us parting. "Bella, love, there are too many people inside, I have to get them out otherwise they will die" he answered. "No way, I'm coming with you. I'm not leaving you alone!" I yelled at him as I shook my head vigorously.

"You have to go with Ben. I will be ok, and we will only be apart for a couple minutes" he argued back. "Forget it, I'm coming with you" I said and walked back in giving him no other option. "Damn it Bella" he cursed as he came after me. "Let's do this very quickly guys" Ben said as he came after us too with Angela hot on his tail. We looked in surprise at her "What you thought I was leaving you alone?" she asked staggered. "Of course not" we mumbled and then got all too work.

One by one we helped people get out of their room. They were all headed to the church. I had checked the last rooms when I saw Edward and Angela walking to me "We're all done, you?" Angela asked. "Me, too" I nodded. "Ah and there's Ben" Edward said as Ben came running to us.

"Let's get out of here" we nodded and followed Ben.

We were running to the church but were surprised to see only a few were there. We saw Roma and her husband and we wanted to make our way over to her when suddenly two bombs fell on the church. "Roma!" I yelled and wanted to run to her but was pulled back by Edward. "Bella, no sssh, we have to get away from here" Edward whispered in my ear. I nodded and tried to hold back the tears.

We were running to the other side of the hospital when I suddenly noticed that Ben and Angela were not with us anymore. "Where are Ben and Angela?" I asked in fear. Edward looked around and cursed "We must have lost them around the church. At least they are still together…I hope" he whispered the last past.

Then I noticed his eyes were wide and fixed on something behind us. I turned to look and saw soldiers, lots of soldiers. "Are they from the US?" I asked in shock. Edward started laughing hysterically which made me look curiously at him. I thought he was losing it.

"Edward?" he cupped my face with both hands and pecked my lips "Baby, we are saved. We are saved!" Edward was so excited but then he got back to serious. "Love, you stay here and I will inform them of our stay here and about Angela and Ben. If anyone gets near you just run okay? It's still not safe, those bastards are still around" He said as he looked around.

"No, let me come with you" I argued. "Bella not this time, I'm just going to tell them who we are and that we need help. It will take a minute and then we'll both be saved, I promise" he mumbled against my lips.

I nodded and then captured his lips with mine. I put everything into that kiss; my love, my fear, my happiness…everything. We both were breathing heavily as we pulled back. "You'll be the death of me woman"

"I love you" I whispered as I hugged him. "I love you, my beautiful Bella. Now let me go so I can save us from this chaos" he teased. My Edward, my poor baby. I never wanted him to be a hero, I just wanted him with me.

He started to run towards the soldier and all the while I kept my eyes on him. When he got closer to them he turned around and looked at me "I love you" he mouthed. That's when I noticed all the guns that where pointed at him.

I gasped and started to run but was suddenly hold back by someone "Bella, no!". Edward was looking at us with a frown. "Ben let go of me!" I yelled "Edward run!" I yelled at him as his frown got even deeper. Tears were running freely on my cheeks. Edward turned around "Noooooooooooooooooooooooo!"

The bullets were being fired.

"Stop! Please stop, he's just a doctor" I yelled. They stopped, I saw the blood drain from their face and knew they had heard me.

I pulled out of Ben's grasp but couldn't seem to step forward. Edward had sunk on his knees as blood covered his body. His eyes were still fixated on me. "Bella" he mouthed and fell forward. I saw it all happen in slow-motion.

I ran to him and stopped the other people from touching him. I took him in my arms and planted kisses on his face. "Bella?" he breathed out. "Sssh it's me…I'm here my love. Your beautiful Bella is here." Edward closed his eyes and tried taking deep breaths.

"Bella, will you marry me?" he asked breathlessly "I'm already yours baby" I answered still kissing him. "We'll go to Seattle and you will wear a wedding dress" he gasped, I caressed his cheek "You will wear a suit and you will look so handsome, like you always do" I whispered and pushed his hair out of his face. "My parents will be there and yours and Alice, Emmet, Rose, Jasper" he kept talking "Yes, and Angela and Ben" I continued

"And the twins" he added. I chuckled "Yes, the twins". "Bella will you sleep with me? I'm so tired but I don't want to sleep alone" I nod in pain "Sleep my Edward".

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><p>Damn the end line always gets me :(<p>

Let me know your thoughts people...


	13. Chapter 13

Epilogue

20 years later

"I could have killed anyone at that moment, especially those soldiers but it was too late. Nothing would have changed what happened to my Edward. He died there, in my arms" I tell you. "I hate them so much" you answer while wiping away my tears. "I know sweetie" I try to smile at you. "What did you do after that?" You ask me.

"I took him to his favorite place, here…Forks. My parents, his family, Ben and Angela we all got here and arranged the funeral. I didn't exactly do a lot. I didn't even talk to anyone back then. I was in some kind of a shock, I couldn't believe that he was gone,

"But of two things I was certain, I was and still am his wife and secondly I will always be with him and he will always be with me. I have never and will never leave Forks or our house. He wished for us to live there, my beautiful Edward…" I sigh, you look at me with tears in your eyes.

"Mom, did dad know you were pregnant with me?" you ask curiously. "No, I didn't found out till after two months after his funeral. Grandpa Carlisle did a check up on me because they were worried about me. I was sick all the time, then I found out I was pregnant with you. It was like I was brought back to life"

"The best present you ever got? The one you were talking about the day you got married.." you wait for me to continue "Yes sweetie that was you, that are you. It was that night or day I got pregnant… my last day with Edward. He made sure not to leave me alone" you nod and look back at his gravestone.

"I love you dad, happy 20th anniversary. You too mom" you come and hug me and then plant a big wet kiss on both my cheeks.

"Promise me EJ that you won't marry some stupid girl and leave me any time soon" I look at you with pleading eyes. "Well about that mom, there's this beautiful girl at home waiting to meet you but I do promise that we won't get married any time soon, we're still not ready for that" You tell me with a big smile on your face. Oh sweetie you remind me so much of your father.

"In that case, let's go home and meet this girl…Uhm" I looked back to Edwards gravestone. "It's ok mom, I'll wait in the car" you kiss my cheek "Bye dad, talk to you soon" say your goodbye and then I watch you walk to the car.

"He's your copy, you know. Same hair, same eyes, same smile even his walk. EJ doesn't know yet but we will be back here in a couple hours, our families are coming to Forks. They have missed you too, love, so much,

"Now, I have to go home and meet this girl. I hope she's good enough for him, you know" I sigh and place two roses on your grave "I love you my beautiful Edward. Happy 20th anniversary."

**The end**

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><p>So alternate ending or not? I'm waiting for your thoughts and revieuws! :))<p> 


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